To: Lady Jag
LOL!
You think we're weird?
Check out the tourism questions we get........
Everything You've Ever Wanted To Know About Canada, eh!
[These questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website…]
Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.
Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.
Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)
A: So its true what they say about Swedes.
Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
A: Let's not touch this one.
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?
Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North… oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.
Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is… oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
2,679 posted on
04/15/2006 11:18:03 AM PDT by
fanfan
(FR is the best/biggest news gathering entity in the whole known history of the world. Thanks Jim.)
To: fanfan
*snarf!*
wow... what a waste of good coffee
2,687 posted on
04/15/2006 11:24:30 AM PDT by
King Prout
(The UN 1967 Outer Space Treaty is bad for America and bad for humanity - DUMP IT.)
To: fanfan
That's funny enough to go on the UT File. Somewhere in the UT File is a litst of questions for Qantas pilots. I'll have to see if I can find it.
2,690 posted on
04/15/2006 11:27:37 AM PDT by
Monkey Face
(Annoy a liberal: Work hard, spend money and fly the flag.)
To: fanfan
Everything You've Ever Wanted To Know About Canada, eh! ... LMOL!
2,697 posted on
04/15/2006 11:43:39 AM PDT by
sionnsar
(†trad-anglican.faithweb.com† | Iran Azadi 2006 | 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0urs (SONY))
To: fanfan
Amazing how ill-informed people are. We had some Euro visitors who figured they could see the US in four days, too - by train!
Three cowboys, one from Louisiana, one from Arkansas, and the other from
Canada are sitting around a campfire, out on the lonesome Californian
desert, each with the bravado for which they are famous. A night of
tall tales begins.
The guy from Louisiana says, "I must be the meanest, toughest cowboy
there is. Why, just the other day, a bull got loose in the corral and
gored six men before I wrestled it to the ground by the horns, with
my bare hands."
The guy from Arkansas can't stand to bested. "Why I was walking down the
trail yesterday and a fifteen foot rattler slid out from under a rock
and made a move for me. I grabbed that snake with my bare hands and bit
it's head off and sucked the poison down in one gulp. And I'm still
here today!"
The Canadian remained silent, slowly stirring the coals with his finger.
2,713 posted on
04/15/2006 12:03:30 PM PDT by
Lady Jag
(I dreamed I surfed all day in my monthly donor wonder bra [https://secure.freerepublic.com/donate])
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