From Direct TV:
WHAT'S WRONG:
You have no picture and a message on your TV screen says, "Searching for satellite signal. Please stand by."
POSSIBLE CAUSES:
A signal isn't getting from your dish to your receiver. This may be a cabling problem.
Your dish isn't picking up a signal. Your dish is blocked or may not be pointed correctly, or there is a problem with the LNB on the dish.
Your receiver is getting a signal but isn't processing the signal correctly.
A very severe storm has temporarily interfered with the signal.
Dialogue courtesy of 'Curb Your Enthusiasm'
Episode: The Benadryl Brownie
Larry can't get the satellite dish to work so his wife and her friends can watch the Emmy's live feed.
Wanda: Why'd you fire the black man?
Larry: I fired the black man... because... he's the guy who set up the whole system here and it doesn't work! And he's here like... every week, I'm givin' him checks, we've got five remotes, I can't turn it on... but I know, you know, *black* man can *never* do anything *wrong*, at least to get fired from a job! Black people *always* do everything right!
[Wanda walks over to TV, pushes button, fixes it]
Wanda: You gotta turn the damn satellite on for the TV to work! See the little green light? Just gotta turn it on! Or you can fire the black man. Whatever works for you.