[beaver fever]

"One great thing about masturbation: you certainly don't have to look your best!"

One thing about masturbation, the flowers and the bottle of wine are optional.

One thing about masturbation, you save 20 bucks on cab fare.

One thing about masturbation, your hand doesn't ask you to cuddle after it's over.

One thing about masturbation, your hand never says no.

One thing about masturbation, you never have to please your hand.

One thing about masturbation, your hand doesn't care whether you're sensitive or interesting.

Too be continued.........

[smug]

I walked into a bar and saw a man pouring beer on his had. I said, "what are you. doing".
"Trying to get my girl friend drunk", he replied.

"I like to lay on more arm till it's numb. That way it's feels like someone else is doing me".