Posted on 02/09/2006 8:01:24 AM PST by Millee
It's been a week for utter stupidity.
First, Nick Flynn tripped over his shoelaces and smashed three very expensive Qing vases at a museum in Cambridge.
Last night the Everton goalkeeper Richard Wright was injured after tripping over a sign telling players not to practice in the Stamford Bridge goalmouth at Chelsea.
He did not make the FA Cup fourth round replay and Everton were hammered 4-1.
And finally, a Land Rover driver admitted to a "blonde moment" after driving her car into a lake.
"One minute I was parking the car, the next I was in the water. I just had a blonde moment," she said.
So what's your worst "blonde moment"? What's the most stupid, embarrassing or humiliating thing you have ever done?
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Here are some of your memorable moments:
I was driving to a friend's house one day wondering why my feet felt so uncomfortable. When I got out of the car I noticed I had the shoes on the wrong feet. Ruth, London
Whilst watching Palestinian police firing rubber bullets at protesters on 'News night' my girlfriend (Brunette) asked me if "rubber bullets hurt more than real ones". I kid you not. Jay Baxter
Hmmm Rather embarrassing!! Was in a club talking to club Dj Tall Paul and ask..Why do they call you Tall Paul?? (he's over 6ft 5in) Tee hee Andrea Cox
I cant believe Im telling some1 this..... but I was looking on the internet to purchase a used car. The usual facts were stated, green, red, 40k, 80k, 165k, alloys, mettalic paint, etc. I couldnt believe my surprise when some1 actually stated that they were... as the previous owner... a black lady. I thought that extremelly irrellevant. I photocopied it, brought it home to the 5 members of my family and told them to listen to this for nonsense.... "opel tigra 60k alloys black lady owner electric sunroof" Get it now.... they all just BURST out laughin. Morto. Olivia the blonde (yes uve guessed it), Limerick, Ireland
A couple of weeks ago I was at my parents' house, where my mother was telling my girlfriend about one of her elderly neighbours who had a glass eye. Later in the car going home she asked me if glass eyes were really made of glass. I told her that one day they probably were, but now a days you could probably get them made of anything. I could see her mulling this over. She then turned to me and said "?.and can you see through these glass eyes?" The `are you serious` look on my face answered the question for her, to which she immediately said she was only joking??but she wasn't. Michael Newton Swinton, Manchester
My blond friend Michelle once asked an American friend "Is America the Norwich side or the Wales side of England!!" Enough said. Emma, Yorkshire Advertisement Advertisement
On a family day out, we were following some friends out toward Nottingham, my wife was on her mobile to the Female passenger of the other car when the signal faded. She said "Get closer to them". I nearly crashed the car laughing. Tony Hinks, Lincoln
I was chatting to a friend of mine while walking down Gower Street in London, after a night out. I wasn't looking where I was going. I turned to face the front and, as soon as I had, walked straight into a parking meter and knocked out my front tooth. Lindsay Wright
Just last week I left my laptop outside my house. I set the laptop bag down on the pavement so that I could reverse my car out of the driveway (it's very tight and one has to "climb" in). I then just drove off! Later that day I got a note through the door from someone saying they'd picked it up. I got it back that day, proving there still nice people in this world. Paul
I went for a meal with my boyfriend and his brother. My boyfriend and his brother ordered a large steak each, I had the chicken. When the food came the steaks were huge but both being men with big appetites they managed to polish them off to my amazement. When the bill came it was passed to me for a joke (my boyfriend's brother was paying). I looked at the bill and said "oh look, it says "well done" for eating your all your steak". He said, "no Rachel, that's how I asked for it cooking". I wanted the ground to swallow me up! Rachel, Leeds
I once picked up my sister from the train station. She got out of the train station opened the back passenger door and slammed it shut. So I sped off, thinking I looked really cool in my new car. I asked her how her day was and whether it was good and finally what was wrong as she wasn't replying. It wasn't until I turned around to look in the back that I discovered she wasn't there at all! She had put her bags in the back and was coming round to sit in the front when I chose that moment to drive off kamikaze style. Needless to say I was mortified as there was also a long queue of black cabs running along the platform and they must have seen it all... I waited for her at the end of the road. Ghazala, London
My highly intelligent, politics grad girlfriend who happens to be blonde, came out with a classic a couple of months ago. Whilst being teased for various prior blonde moments she uttered the classic, "It's not my fault, I'm just not the sharpest spoon in the drawer......". Evidently this is true. This also follows her recently telling me to "Bite the bull by the horns" Marvellous. All this, and more, while being far more intelligent than almost everybody else I know, myself included. I guess that's what having blonde hair does to you every now and then. Lee
Should we be calling these "blonde" moments? Frequently associating negative experiences, even if humorous, with a biological characteristic is reinforcing a stereotype and can be traumatic. Describing them as "lapses in concentration" or "Doh" moments (Homer Simpson) may be better. Just a thought. Hans, London
Man #1: Beer?
Man #2: No, too early in the mornin'.
Man #1: OK then, Scotch?
About 3 weeks ago, we stopped for gas, my husband got out, started the pump and after a few minutes, got back in the car. I thought he was finished, so I drove off. Turns out, he got in the car to get out of the cold and I drove off with the nozzle still attached. Luckily, it came out, but gas was spewing everywhere on the ground.
Truly embarrassing.
And expensive! - LOL!!
Here's one more horrifying than funny.
I sent my husband an e-mail while he was out of town once, b!tching up a storm about his annoying parents who were staying at our house for a visit at the time. I sent it to his parents by mistake!
I realized it, right after I hit send. It was funny trying to apologize to them after that. My wicked-evil father-in-law forwarded it to my husband with comments, no doubt trying to get my hubby pissed at me. Joke was on FIL from hell though, because my hubby happens to agree with me.
Even though I have had every color of the rainbow when it comes to hair color..LOL MY blonde moments comes to my KEYS! and my glasses! now I have multiple keys and glasses for every room so I don't have to worry about blonde moments.
The staging lane that I used had to be closed off for 20 minutes to clean up the coolant mess.
I had to be pushed back into the staging area to put my belt back on, duct tape the radiator hose and limp back home.
**Lesson not known at time: Do burn outs in third gear (auto trans).
OMG - I would have been mortified!
Two words: Ross Perot.
:/
I was. Let's just say, I ALWAYS check the sender now before sending e-mails! LOL! What an idiot I am !
ROFL! You actually took the hose back?!?!?! Haaaa, haaaa!
I have tears in my eyes!
But, that's just me! ;o)
I sure did, it would have been on my conscience, and I'll do just about anything to give people a good laugh.
I would have snuck a few drinks from that bad boy in the bathroom or something.
LOL now that is funny
Another blonde moment:
In college, my best friend and I went to the same school and we had gone home for the weekend. I was supposed to pick her up on Monday morning to drive back to school (it was only a 2 hours drive). I was about half-way back, when I realized that I forgot to pick her up.
She got back later that day, after taking the bus. She was soooooo p!ssed at me. We laugh about it now.
Like one morning at work a few years ago, I tripped over a power strip with a hot cup of coffee in my hand, fell, and the coffee went up all over my face, hair and the shoulders of the shirt I was wearing. AND it stung my face.
And yep...I had quite an audience for that one.
I had to go home to change clothes, wash my face and wash the coffee out of a large hank of my hair.
That's just one of many. (sigh...)
True sign of a happy marriage, when you side with each other instead of your parents. Good for you both!
You poor thing. That must have sucked.
Many of you are already here - but I'd love to hear about your.... ahem... Blonde Moments....
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