One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he remembers that
it's his daughter's birthday.
He pulls over to a toy store and asks the salesperson, "How much is the
Barbie on the display window?"
The salesperson answers, "Which one? We have: Workout Barbie for $19.95,
Shopping Barbie for $19.95, Beach Barbie for $19.95, Disco Barbie for
$19.95 or Divorced Barbie for $265.95".
The amazed father asks: "What? Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.95 and
all the others only $19.95?"
The salesperson annoyingly answers : "Sir..., "Divorced Barbie comes
with: Ken's Car, Ken's House, Ken's Boat, Ken's Furniture, Ken's
Computer and... One of Ken's Friends.
A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter
and says, "Hi... You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather
have a job."
The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent.
We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a
chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful nymphomaniac daughter. You'll
have to drive around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your
clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be
expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You will have to satisfy her sexual urges.
You'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The
starting salary is $200,000 a year."
The guy, wide-eyed, says, "You're bullshi**in' me!"
The social worker says, "Yeah, well... you started it."