Talking animals?
While riding one day, a cowboy met an Indian riding along with a dog and a sheep and he began a conversation. Cowboy: "Hey, nice dog you got there. Mind if I speak to him?"
Indian: "Dog no talk."
Cowboy: "Hey dog, how's it going?"
Dog: "Doin' alright."
Indian:( Look of shock )
Cowboy:"Is this Indian your owner?" ( Pointing at the Indian )
Dog: "Yep."
Cowboy: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Indian:( Look of disbelief )
Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Indian: "Horse no talk."
Cowboy: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Good."
Indian:( Extreme look of shock )
Cowboy: "Is this your owner?" ( Pointing at the Indian )
Horse: "Yep."
Cowboy: "How does he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in a shed to protect me."
Indian:( Complete look of utter amazement )
Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Indian: "Sheep liar."
Overworked!
For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my job, but now I found out the real reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked.
The population of this country is 237 million.
104 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work.
There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million to do the work.
Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government, leaving 19 million to do the work.
2.8 million are in the Armed Forces, which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.
Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for State and City Governments and that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.
At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals, leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.
Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work. You and me.
And you're sitting at your computer reading jokes.
Thanks for the laugh I'm printing it out for my husband so he can tell his golfing buddies tomorrow.