My favorite "Gertnerisms":
"Well well well. Welfare recipients and homeless vagabonds of Asbury Park, NJ and to the thousands upon thousands watching me coast to coaston pay-per-view. At this time allow me to introduce (as if you could possibly stop me) the contingent, the masters of the three-way-dance. In the ring at this time he is the most outspoken commodity in ECW, he is the voice of a generation and the silence behind the violence, Sign Guy Dudley."
"And then there's me, I'm like milk, I do a body good, the Quintessential Studmuffin, the man who's wit is more tongue in cheek than a lesbian orgy, Joel Your Girlfriend Has Me On Her Speed Dial Because She Likes the Way I Star 69 Her Gertner"
"Joel " The girls like to call me Fred Flinstone because they love the way I make there BED ROCK" Gertner"
"And there's me, Joel, the biggest ladykiller in Buffalo since O.J. Simpson, Gertner."
"Well, well, well if you got an hour, I've got the power. Joel 'You can't have your pudding if you don't eat your meat' Gertner."
"The quintessential muffstuffer opps I mean studdmuffin "Just like the Rubix Cube, the more you play with it, the harder it gets"
"Joel "Harder than the tree that hit Sonny Bono" Gertner"
"Joel "Bigger and better than the Titanic, because only 400 women went down on the Titanic" Gertner"
"Also in the ring at this time, standing before me and intimidating the masses. From the twisted steel section of Dudleyville, 25 and 3/8 inches of the largest arms in the world attached to the man who last night took such liberties with your mother that he is now recognized as your father in 17 states, the gargantuan who is known as Big Dick Dudley."
"It is rich marvelous I, The Quintessential Studmuffin Joel "The skinless bananna in your tropical fruit salad of love" Gertner"
What a man!!!