Posted on 10/26/2005 5:28:03 PM PDT by TSchmereL
Dear Mr. Mathews:
You have been selected as a witness and are scheduled to appear before the Viewer-ship Ratings Board in order to fill dead air space. Your viewer-ship consists of from sixteen to twenty three persons from the District of Columbia. It is their responsibility to inquire into media allegations of federal crimes which may not have been committed in this District.
As a witness you will be asked to provide useless liberal propaganda to cable subscribers. Only the members of your audience, attorneys for the United States, and a stenographer are permitted in the studio while you drool.
We advise you that your audience is conducting an investigation of impossible non-violations of federal criminal laws not involving, but necessarily limited to, jack shit. You are advised that the concealment or alteration of any fact required to be produced before your audience constitutes an obvious violation of human decency, including but not limited to ennui.
You are advised that you are a target of the disgust of your audience. However, you may refuse to ask your guests any question if a truthful answer to the question would tend to incriminate you. Everything that you do or say will be used against you in a subsequent employment decision. If you have obtained your own camera man, who represents you personally, your audience will permit you a reasonable opportunity to entertain them.
Cordially,
Ms. Nbc
All Mathews cares about is ratings
And by responding he knows you are watching
You have fallen into his trap
He doesn't care if ALL his audience is PO-ED Conservatives as long as he has an audience
sorry.
TSch -
Excellent parody.
I'm still chuckling as I write this.
LOL! Matthews opened his show tonight with his breathless recounting that Fitzgerald's team had gone out to interview the Wilsons' neighbors. "They asked them if they hdd known she worked at the CIA. The answer was NO!".
Now, I've read that a couple of them apparently IMMEDIATELY contacted the media to spread the word that they'd said "NO!". But, so what? How do the prosecutors know these aren't simply partisans who, by now, have taken sides like everyone else? How do they know they're telling the truth? Are there other neighbors who DID know?
It's a ridiculous side story...but Matthews leads with it. I haven't seen someone this obsessed since Geraldo did O.J.
It appears that Mr Mathews isn't going to be doing much better in the near future. His guest list for November include, Jimmy Carter, John McCain, and Mary Mapes.
I remember reading a story months ago that said neighbors did know she worked for the CIA. I assumed that's why the FBI is questioning them now.
I feel genuine sorrow for Chris sometimes. I detect some sort of void probably left wanting from his early departure post President Ford, Pre-Reagan administrations. Maybe we should pray for him sometimes.
I can't believe you're that stupid!
Then again, since you did it I guess I'm wrong.
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