PETA held a press conference and announced today it's condemnation of former president George H.W. Bush and the current president Bush.
"Look!" said PETA official Gary Yourofsky, "They are killing that fish! Killing a fish! An innocent fish! Look at the pain on the fishes eye! That poor fish! Those ba$tards!"
Yourofsky went on to say "That fish has a hook in it and and is being held by it's lips! Those pretty pouty fish lips. Look at that slimy slippery fish mouth! Oh, and look at the stripes on that fish! And that tail, that tail is hot! "
Unfortunately the press conference was stopped because Mr. Yourofsky suddenly removed his clothes and started to fondle himself in front of reporters.
(WE NOW CUT AWAY TO A SECRET ROOM HIGH ATOP THE WILLIAM J. CLINTON LIBRARY AND MASSAGE PARLOUR IN ARKANSAS)
CLINTON (watching TV): Damn! What is this PETA guy doing? Look what he is doing with that fish picture! This is great TV!
CLINTON (turning to secret service agent): Hey! Get me that bottle of oil from the bathroom and take a hike for a few minutes. This PETA guy is making me hot!
SECRET SERVICE AGENT: Should we charge the defibrillator as usual sir?
CLINTON: Hell yes! Just make sure to run in here with it and hit me with a few 100 volts at just the right time. And check around and see if we have a fish market close by. This PETA guy is on to something!
SECRET SERVICE AGENT: (sighing) Yes sir!
CLINTON: Oh, I need some more Hillary posters! Tack some more up on the wall! The life size ones! The ones with the big fat ankles.
SECRET SERVICE AGENT: Sir, we've talked to you about this many times before. You cannot shoot the shotgun in the library building. It's OK to pee on the pictures again, throw eggs at them again but just not shoot them with the 12 gauge. It upsets the people touring the facility.
CLINTON: Like hell! We haven't had a visitor since those Saudi guys were here last month! Man, that's a nice fish. Yea baby!
SECRET SERVICE AGENT: Uh, I'll be outside......