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I'm on this train late! Was out of town.

Congrats, Rob. You have received a marvelous gift.

I found AA to be very useful for myself. For me, it gave me a focus for many years until I was able to deal with an underlying problem. I believe that is the case for many of us, even though we ended up drinking for no reason other than we were chemically dependent.

My second epiphany was finally being able to admit that stopping drinking was not enough for me. Working the steps was not enough either. I have an underlying neurological disorder, chronic PTSD, that no amount of group support or talking therapy was going to be able to alleviate enough.

I was technically 'sober' for a very long time, but certainly not happy, joyous and free. It was at the suggestion of another Nam Vet in AA who recommended that I get treatment for the PSTD. I finally relented to taking meds about 2 years ago. What a change!

I am grateful for AA in that it got me to put down the drink. I am grateful for the support that I got from AA all of those years waiting for my miracle to happen. I am grateful for people like you who will share openly about how it is possible to get out of that pit of despair.

I attend very few AA meetings anymore. I have the not drinking part down pat now. I continue my PTSD treatment, which will be a lifetime for me as it is treatable, not cureable.

The fellowship in AA is un-matched. It is not for everyone. If you decide it is not for you, however, you owe yourself a good look at why. Most folks go away because they are not ready to stop drinking (not all, but most). I'm not really talking to you Rob about this, but others who may be struggling with the booze issue.

For me, my drinking was but a symptom of a greater illness. I am well aware that most of my peers are dead, or the living dead. After over 21 years of not drinking, I am starting to feel the benefits of living, not just surviving.

Good luck to you, and may God Bless.