I don't worry too much about how people perceive me anymore.... it's an exercise in futility. Some dates thought I was beautiful...some not. Some think I'm intelligent and others think I'm too naive. It's all in the eye of the beholder.....so do what you can to be happy with yourself. (you'll never please everyone!) Believe me....after it's all said and done... you have to live with YOU..... forever. LOL.
If you feel you need to be more assertive... then exercise that. Women like strong, decisive men who stick to their guns......but are quick to be humble when wrong. (and I don't mean wimpy-girly sorry) They don't let ego rule above all else.
If you need to improve your financial situation to provide for a household... what's to stop you? Being single affords you every opportunity to set up your life for the future "team"... right? Set your goals and move forward and don't let anything stand in your way! (we're our own worst enemies in this regard)
Last....if you think you're nerdy....do some self-improvement. Get some mags...find a new style....haircut and rid yourself of the black rim-horned glasses. :) Be who you feel you are on the inside... and let it reflect outwardly!
Ok... leave the quarter by the door on your way out. Shop closed! lol
BTW....if you think I'm "lecturing"....believe me when I say I'm talking to myself ...more than you! *wink*