Posted on 10/06/2005 6:33:59 PM PDT by pissant
The fashion for an out-there derrière, as made famous by J-Lo has prompted a market for silicone implants in the buttocks.
Women (or is it their boyfriends?) want their bottoms high and round. An incision is made in the centre of the lower back, and the implants are placed behind the gluteus maximus muscle.
Does it hurt?
You'll be uncomfortable and bruised, have to wear a support garment for at least two weeks and must carry a soft cushion everywhere - not very J-Lo.
Why have it?
If your rear end is hopelessly Anglo-Saxon (flat) and no amount of "buns of steel" workouts will perk it up, you could benefit.
What are the downsides?
There's a slim chance of rupture and infection. Some patients have suffered swelling and hardness - not ideal for a bottom. It can take about six weeks to recover. And what happens when sticky-out bottoms go out of fashion?
Where can I get it?
Chris Inglefield, a highly regarded surgeon, has some impressive examples of his work on his website (www.cjinglefield-plasticsurg.com).
How much?
Around £3,000.
Who has had it done?
No A-listers, as far as we know. Brazilian women - for whom the ideal buttock is spherical - are the pioneers. It has gone down a storm in Los Angeles. Some lap dancers have found it boosts their careers.
You've spoiled me...
Well thanks pissant for this thread. I wish I could stay up because I'm in a catty mood and feel like hating on other girls' looks. I must get my beauty rest.
Well he probably did not want to be hubby #12 anyway!
Goodnight ya'll
(God help me -- Do I ever get enough of the lovely Miss Thomas :-D)
Had one earlier today. Ya missed it!
Gotta fly. Get mistress Arisana out of her dungeon and keep the thread alive! See ya!
G'night to you both.
Yes sir!...
Honey -- we've been outed...
Yeah Eva Mendez saw her in the movie Hitch-pretty funny!
Yes sir!...
Honey -- we've been outed...
So, are you gonna put one of those nice taglines for me like Petronski has for cyborg? Huh? Huh? Nah. I didn't think so.
(Where's my whip when I need it?!?!?!)
P.S. arisana [sic] is going to start spelling a certain FReeper's name pisnast [siccer]
Unscrew your belly button and your bottom will fall off.
I knew there would be a solution to this. LOL
(Where's my whip when I need it?!?!?!)"
Hmmm...Am I infringing on a trademark here?
Oh no. Not at all.
Sir Mix-A-Lot's "Baby Got Back" translated into Latin
Mixaloti equitis
mehercle!
(By Hercules!)
Rebecca, ecce! tantae clunes isti sunt!
(Rebecca, behold! Such large buttocks she has!)
amica esse videtur istorum hominum rhythmicorum.
(She appears to be a girlfriend of one of those rhythmic-oration people.)
sed, ut scis,
(But, as you know)
quis homines huiusmodi intellegere potest?
(Who can understand persons of this sort?)
colloquuntur equidem cum ista eo tantum, quod scortum perfectum esse videtur.
(Verily, they converse with her for this reason only, namely, that she appears to be a complete whore.)
clunes, aio, maiores esse!
(Her buttocks, I say, are rather large!)
nec possum credere quam rotondae sint.
(Nor am I able to believe how round they are.)
en! quam exstant! nonne piget te earum?
(Lo! How they stand forth! Do they not disgust you?)
ecce mulier Aethiops!
(Behold the black woman!)
magnae clunes mihi placent, nec possum de hac re mentiri.
(Large buttocks are pleasing to me, nor am I able to lie concerning this matter.)
quis enim, consortes mei, non fateatur,
(For who, colleagues, would not admit,)
cum puella incedit minore medio corpore
(Whenever a girl comes by with a rather small middle part of the body)
sub quo manifestus globus, inflammare animos
(Beneath which is an obvious spherical mass, that it inflames the spirits)
Once again, you save the day.
An ass thread, classic.
You are THE MAN.
That's the way girls are supposed to look!
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