Todays PUNishment (vanity)

e-mail | unknown | anonymous (you'll see why)

[Jean S]

Groan!

[PilloryHillary]

UNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGH

[asp1]

Hysterical! Thanks!

[carlr]

Probably should be in General/Chat.
Hope it does`nt go to harsh on you but afraid a zot may be in your future.

[shezza]

Did you hear about the dyslexic man who walked into a bra?

[Americanwolf]

Ya beat me!


in that case


My beeber is stunned that some one would post these puns...!

(that was probably as bad.)

[hole_n_one]

Bill Clinton is an impeached, disbarred, perjuring, witness tampering, raping ex-president.

I don't have a clever, funny punchline to add to that.
I just thought I'd sieze on an opportunity to throw it out there.

[burzum]

Once there was a marine biologist who loved dolphins. He spent his time trying to feed and protect his beloved creatures of the sea. One day, in a fit of inventive genius, he came up with a serum that would make dolphins live forever!

Of course he was ecstatic. But he soon realized that in order to mass produce this serum he would need large amounts of a certain compound that was only found in nature in the metabolism of a rare South American bird. Carried away by his love for dolphins, he resolved that he would go to the zoo and steal one of these birds.

Unbeknownst to him, as he was arriving at the zoo an elderly lion was escaping from its cage. The zoo keepers were alarmed and immediately began combing the zoo for the escaped animal, unaware that it had simply lain down on the sidewalk and had gone to sleep.

Meanwhile, the marine biologist arrived at the zoo and procured his bird. He was so excited by the prospect of helping his dolphins that he stepped absentmindedly over the sleeping lion on his way back to his car.

Immediately he was arrested. The crime: transporting a myna across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.

[WestTexasWend]

"afraid a zot may be in your future."

Sorry. Ignorance is no excuse, and I'm no crybaby so I'll take my lumps and go back to lurking.

If I never freep again, remember...they weren't my puns. ;)

[Americanwolf]

NO arguements here.. Just read my tagline and you'll see my love for slick willy.

[carlr]

Not to worry,looks like all is well.

[Darnright]

The New Orleans Police Chief came running up to the Mayor. He breathlessly told Nagin, that the looters had stolen all of the bathroom fixtures in the courthouse!

Nagin was outraged. "Who could have done this??"

The police chief said sadly, "sorry, sir, but we have nothing to go on".

[asp1]

Oh no you don't. You are not getting off so easily. As punishment you must add post #9 to your list! :0)

I am a totally deranged person who absolutely laughs out loud at these. :0)

[Darnright]

There were three Indian squaws. One slept on a deer skin. One slept on an elk skin. The third slept on a hippopotamus skin. All three became pregnant and the first two each had a baby boy. The one who slept on the hippopotamus skin had twin boys. This goes to prove that the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides.

A man rushed into the doctor's office and shouted, "Doctor! I think I'm shrinking!!" The doctor calmly responded, "Now, settle down. You'll just have to be a little patient."

Evidence has been found that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers. However, all the league records were unfortunately destroyed in a fire. Thus we'll never know for whom the Tells bowled.

[asp1]

Stop it! You guys are killing me! LOL!

[Taxman]

Actually, I liked 'em.

Even laughed at a couple.

[Darnright]

A skeptical anthropologist was cataloging South American folk remedies
with the assistance of a tribal brujo who indicated that the leaves of a
particular fern were a sure cure for any case of constipation. When the
anthropologist expressed his doubts, the brujo looked him in the eye and
said, "Let me tell you, with fronds like these, who needs enemas?"

[nhoward14]

You know, the drink "Gatoraid" was developed by the University of Florida, who's mascot is a "Gator."

Lots of people know this.

What many people don't know is that the project was originally slated for Florida State, but they changed it at the last minute.

Why?

They decided that a product named "Gatoraid" would be more marketable than "Seminole Fluid."

[asp1]

OK! (Falling out of my chair laughing.) Where do you get these?