1. You measure distance in minutes. 2. You've ever had to switch for "heat" to "A/C" in the same day. 3. Stores don't have bags, they have sacks. 4. You see a car with the engine running in the Wal-Mart parking lot with no one in it, no mater what time of the year. 5. You use "fix" as a verb. Example: I am fixin' to go to the store. 6. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit or a vegetable. (Hey!!! We have two tree and a crawdad festival) 7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked. 8. You carry jumper cables for your own car. 9. You know what "cow tipping" and "snipe hunting" are. l0. You only have four spices in your kitchen: Salt, Pepper, Catsup, and Tabasco. 11. You think everyone from north of Dallas has an accent. (They DO!! Dayum Yanks!!) 12. You think sexy underwear is a tee shirt and boxer shorts. 13. The local papers cover national and international news on one page but require six pages to cover Friday night high school football. 14. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday. 15. You know which leaves make good toilet paper. 16. You find 100 degrees a "tad" warm 17. You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer and Deer Season. 18. You know whether another Texan is from East, West, North, or South Texas as soon as he opens his mouth. 19 Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past-time known as "goin' Wal-Martin" or "off to Wally-world". 20. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather. 21. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop...It's a Coke regardless of brand of flavor. (When I was a kid in Texas it was called "Soda Water") 22. You understand these jokes.