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I can make anybody pretty.
I can make you believe any lie. I can make you pick a fight with somebody twice your size.
Well, I’ve been known to cause a few break-ups,
An' I’ve been known to cause a few births.
Well, I can make you new friends, or get you fired from work.

And since the day I left Milwaukee,
Lynchburg an' Bordeaux, France,
Been making the bars lots of big money,
An' helpin' white people dance.
I got you in trouble in High School,
But College, now that was a ball.
You had some of the best times you’ll never remember with me:
Alcohol; Alcohol.

I got blamed at your wedding reception,
For your best man’s embarrassing speech.
And also for those naked pictures of you at the beach.
I’ve influenced Kings and world leaders,
I helped Hemingway write like he did.
And I’ll bet you a drink or two, that I can make you put
that lampshade on your head.

‘Cause since the day I left Milwaukee,
Lynchburg and Bordeaux, France,
I been making a fool out of folks just like you,
An' helping white people dance.
I am medicine and I am poison,
I can help you up or make you fall.
You had some of the best times you’ll never remember with me:
Alcohol.

Yeah, since the day I left Milwaukee,
Lynchburg an' Bordeaux, France,
Been making the bars lots of big money, (Helpin' white people dance.)
Yeah, I got you in trouble in High School,
But College, now that was a ball.
You had some of the best times you’ll never remember with me:
Alcohol; Alcohol.

(Alcohol.)
(Alcohol.)
Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na.
Na, na, na, na, na, na, na.

Braid Paisley