Similar to your wolf analogy....
I was always told that a "Leopard never changes his spots - he just rearranges them..."
That's why I didn't marry that first guy....
;-)
On the other hand, there was another thing mom always told me that I did learned well and have never gotten:
"It doesn't matter who "started it", you are going to get into the same amount of trouble for fighting ... so, if you are going to fight, be sure to get your licks in and fight to win!"