That's when you find out who your true friends are!
"Say mate, I just got snake bitten in the bum while taking a dump. Do you think you could suck out the poison? No, wait, come back!"
"Doc says you gonna die."
So you've heard the joke?
Two men are walking out of the desert. One stops to relieve himself and is bitten on his wedding tackle, right on the end. The other man treats for shock, then he flips open his cell phone to call 911.
The dispatcher puts the second man through to a doctor. The doctor says, "Based on your location, and where he was bitten, the likelihood of your friend's system shutting down as a result of the venom's accelerated entry into the bloodstream. I recommend, as off-putting as it may be, to make an incision directly over the bite and suck the poison out to the extent you can. This will buy emergency units enough time to get to your friend."
The second man thanks the doctor, then hangs up.
The man with the bite asks his friend, "So what does the doctor say?"
The second replies, "He says you are going to die my friend, I'm sorry . . ."