You know, I actually understand the fear of bad behavior by beneficiaries, because I've seen them act badly. Not bad enough to kill, but bad enough to argue over dishes they'll never use. But I think most families would be apalled at the suggestion that they do not care about the deceased, and would not trade all inheritance for more time with their lost one. I know I'd trade it all for my mom back.
But do you want your medical decisions being made by someone ~not~ close to you? A hired gun or attorney instead of your family?
Hmmm I don't know. I see a heck of a lot of merit in having someone who has no finacial interests in making the decisions. Actually I think a talk with your family lawyer, video taped in orer to refresh his memory, would be better than any one else. I think more often than not it IS about the money. So yeah I guess I am saying I do prefer a professional 3rd party.
"Not bad enough to kill, but bad enough to argue over dishes they'll never use."
There's something about a death in the family that makes people go absolutely goofy. My experience is that's it's usually someone by marriage instigating the crap.
"You know your mom/dad would want you to have those dishes, you should raise hel*."
Remember that $100 you lent your brother 800 years ago? You should get his car. LOL