Replies

WASHINGTON (AP) - John Kerry's wife sang about how happy she is that he wasn't elected. Karl Rove revealed his successful strategy for winning President Bush a second term. Wannabe presidential candidates pressed for advantage in the 2008 race. It was as close to "Saturday Night Live" as Washington gets, as journalists assumed the personas of politicians in song, dance and wisecracks at the Gridiron Club's 120th annual dinner.

It's a journalistic tradition in which, for one night, members of the Fourth Estate turn the tables on the powerful people they report and write about daily. The Gridiron Club's motto is to "singe, but never burn."

In a nod to 2008, they parodied the White House aspirations of Republican Sen. Chuck Hagel of Nebraska and Democratic Gov. Bill Richardson of New Mexico, featured speakers at the white-tie dinner.

Richardson compared the Bush's administration's treatment of U.S. allies over the Iraq war to the NCAA basketball tournament.

"Sixty-four teams start and they're whittled down to just one," Richardson said in prepared remarks. "Kind of reminds me of what we've done with our allies."

Hagel paid tribute to Johnny Carson, a Nebraska legend, by impersonating "Carnac the Magnificent," one of the late comedian's characters.

"Answer: March Madness," Hagel said. "What do Democrats call my Social Security plan?"

Following another close presidential election, the show poked fun at despondent Democrats and smug Republicans.

Prison-striped Democratic leaders were seen trying to figure a way out of "Gitmo," the U.S. facility at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, where the government is holding suspected terrorists.

One sketch had Massachusetts Sen. Kerry singing a lament about "why, oh why, oh why did I ever lose Ohio?" while in the next scene wife Teresa Heinz Kerry appeared positively giddy over her husband's loss to Bush.

"Thank heaven, he lost the race," her character sang to the tune of "Thank Heaven for Little Girls." "Now I can tell the press just how and when and where to go, and I'm allowed my wine and escargots."

Republicans were singed, too.

To the tune of "Doo Wah Diddy Diddy," a Karl Rove impersonator sang about the challenges of turning Bush into presidential timber. "He looked smug, he looked dim. How we gonna win with him?" he sang. Bush and his wife, Laura, were in the audience.

Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld was rapped for his Iraq war planning. "Rummy, have you some spare Teflon coating that we could wear?" soldiers sang to the tune of "Mister Sandman." "You said we'd win Iraq with ease, Mr. Rumsfeld, we need Humvees."

Other 2008-themed skits portrayed Democratic Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton of New York singing about how she'll "turn those red states blue" and Senate newcomer Barack Obama of Illinois, prancing around in a gold outfit and halo, urging the party to "go with a guy who walks on water."

Founded in 1885, the Gridiron Club is made up of Washington news bureau chiefs, columnists, reporters, cartoonists and editors. It exists only for the annual dinner and political roast. Every president since Benjamin Harrison, except for Grover Cleveland, has attended.