Pieces of her, why hate Ashlee Simpson? (barf alert)

http://www.sfbg.com/39/18/noise_ashlee.html ^ | Feb 2 | Jimmy Draper

[Critical Bill]

..and it's even more maddeningly apparent that she's been maligned simply for not fitting many people's ill-conceived idea of a rock star.

Is this guy for REAL?

[Drango]

and impromptu jig later

White girl can't dance.

[goldstategop]

If only she had half the talent of her famous sister, Jessica, this wouldn't even a point of discussion.

Denny Crane: "I want two things. First God and then Fox News."

[Rodney King]

She is not a real musician. She is simply the creation of a producer. She was never famous for any real talent. As she lives by the sword (press hype), she must also die by the sword.

[Echo Talon]

She can't sing a lick, but she looks purdy...

[DainBramage]

Theres just something about her ..(cough) boobs.

[Fintan]

After all, contrary to what you probably heard, Autobiography is one of 2004's best albums, establishing her as someone unafraid to express all the chaos, confusion, and contradictions that are part of becoming an adult.

 

Using this criteria, my new album, Geese Farts on a Muggy Day should qualify for a Lifetime Achievement Award.

[PennsylvaniaMom]

Could be Dain, that they are not real!!! Jessica has implants as well...but she (now try and follow the logic here) was 'natural' at the beginning of her career. She also was about 25 lbs heavier (remember, breast tissue is fat) and Jessica had a healthy, naturally proportional figure...which didn't fly in the entertainment world so she lost alot of weight (so she would have thin arms, slight hips, etc.) and then had to have implants to make up for what she lost, but was already there.

Wait about ten to fifteen years...Papa Simpson will be the 'new' Joe Jackson

[William of Orange]

she can't sing, period. No journalist/reporter/whatever can make me feel different, when you can't sing you can't sing, I can't sing either but at least I don't pretend that I can (or make loadsa cash with lack of talent....)

[Puddleglum]

She made me cringe at the Orange Bowl (no wait, that was OU that made me cringe).

[I got the rope]

[niteowl77]

Despite having gotten a lot of chuckles out of the misadventures of Ms. Simpson, I find myself agreeing with this guy to some extent. If industry crafting albums that end up far beyond an entertainer's real abilities is a crime, then throw the book at a lot of artists. I once paid some good coin to see a then-popular, nationally-known band, only to find out that they bit the big green one when the sound system wasn't right on the money.

(To be honest, they didn't sound so hot when the system was working.)

I also think there is something to his suggestion that throwing Ashlee to the sharks is little more than an attempt at "street cred" on the part of some detractors. Ashlee is does not belong to enough "protected categories," and thus she is easily voted out of the boat; think they'd toss out Melissa Etheridge or Janet Jackson for an identical sound malfunction? Oh, I don't think so!

I may be all wet, but given the choice between a performance by the ridiculed Ashlee Simpson or the deified Yoko Ono, I know which one I'd rather be compelled to watch/listen.

[xsmommy]

well that makes sense then with the pic i saw of Jessica on the Dukes of Hazzard thread yesterday. her chest looked smaller and her ribs were showing, i was surprised, bc i didn't recall her being so thin.

[PennsylvaniaMom]

Yes...I guess it is some type of formula. Big chest, washboard abs, no hips, skinny legs and arms, hollowed out cheekbones...not as nature intends (note to male FReepers--breast tissue=fat tissue, fat tissue makes rounder hips, fuller legs, etc). What a shame...Jessica (dumb blonde act notwithstanding) is actually very talented. Too bad they just couldn't leave her be the way she was...

[Obadiah]

This is exactly why the backlash has been so brutal. By straying from the so-called fake and feminized realm of pop music to make a rock album, Simpson and her prefab persona threaten to sully the supposedly authentic rock pantheon – a canon that, despite the inclusion of a few women, largely remains the domain of men...

Oh, I see! It's our fault. We're all simple-minded sexists who hate women. Yeah, that's the ticket.

I swear, these liberal writing putzes are one trick ponies. If you don't agree with their view, why your a racist, a homophobe, a sexist. Get lost, moron!

[xsmommy]

yes the breathy simpleton act gets to me, but i thought she was attractive before. the antithesis of the skeletal Laura Flynn Boyle, whose disturbing pix were on her thread yesterday. EEKS!

[Jason_b]

Maybe Paula Abdul will take pity on her and teach her a few steps.

[FITZ]

That she may not possess the most technically proficient voice? That hit doctors helped her write Autobiography? That her fans are predominantly young girls?

Yes I think he's for real. The worst thing for a pop celebrity to do is refer to themselves or try to be a rock musicican. Pop celebrities should be happy with the money and fame they have --- but when they take themselves too seriously, they're going to be mocked.

[JoeSixPack1]

Wait about ten to fifteen years...Papa Simpson will be the 'new' Joe Jackson

No need to wait, He already is. And by building up his no-talent daughter on the tail of his talented daughter, everybody makes money. Everybody is happy. The world has someone to laugh at, the punks have someone to admire, and finally, when the charade is over and Ashley is discarded, will anyone notice?

No one except Ashley. Maybe.

[AlbertWang]

By straying from the so-called fake and feminized realm of pop music to make a rock album, Simpson and her prefab persona threaten to sully the supposedly authentic rock pantheon – a canon that, despite the inclusion of a few women, largely remains the domain of men like Robert Plant, Bob Dylan, and Jack White. As a result, Simpson's detractors have maligned her as a talentless interloper in rock

I'm confussed. Is this guy teh funny or teh stupid?