She can't sing a lick, but she looks purdy...
Posted on 02/02/2005 4:00:57 AM PST by Critical Bill
When backing tracks are the norm in genres ranging from pop to hip-hop, why hate Ashlee Simpson? IF SHE HASN'T done so already, Britney Spears might want to consider sending Ashlee Simpson a sympathy card. In October, just as the public was taking its hatred of Mrs. Federline to a new extreme – for committing the cardinal sins of, uh, "marrying down" and eating Cheetos – Simpson appeared on Saturday Night Live and, one backing-track mishap and impromptu jig later, gave Spears an indefinite hiatus from her reigning status as music's most reviled star. By the time Jessica's little sis got booed for her halftime performance at last month's Orange Bowl, Spears probably could've done anything short of give birth to the Antichrist (or at least another greatest-hits package) and still not come close to evoking the ire Simpson did with her ill-fated SNL appearance.
Indeed, the backlash against Simpson has been swift, severe, and entirely disproportionate to her so-called crime. Before you could say "acid reflux," a clip of the incident circulated, to much derision, around the Internet. People started petitions to convince her to change careers. A group called HOPE (Horrified Observers of Pedestrian Entertainment) formed to offer people the opportunity to exchange their copies of Simpson's triple-platinum debut, Autobiography (Geffen), for Elvis Costello albums. "Why Is This Woman Still a Star?" asked the Jan. 6 cover of New York's Daily News, while the perpetually smug-mugged Jay Leno quipped, "I guess you know they had two problems during the Orange Bowl halftime show: Kelly Clarkson's mic wasn't working, and Ashlee Simpson's was." To say Simpson has become a popular punch line would be an understatement.
But why, when young female stars get publicly ridiculed on a daily basis, has the reaction to Simpson been so particularly nasty? After all, using a backing track is a common practice to bolster live vocals in genres ranging from pop to hip-hop, and outright lip-synching isn't even entirely unheard of. (It was reported by fans that on her recent tour, for instance, Dolly Parton admittedly mouthed the words to some of her songs.) Besides, anyone who bought Autobiography after watching the first season of MTV's The Ashlee Simpson Show couldn't have been surprised, much less cared, that Simpson needed vocal assistance. From its footage of meetings with other songwriters to strategy sessions with the label, the reality series made no attempt to hide that her career is prefabricated.
No, the lip-synching backlash didn't come from fans who suddenly felt duped. Instead, it's been driven largely by people who never liked – and would never like – Simpson in the first place. The SNL snafu simply allowed these people to further rage against the teen machine by making her a symbol of that most detested product of the music industry, the manufactured star. But does it matter that she never gained credibility by slogging her way through tiny rock clubs? That she may not possess the most technically proficient voice? That hit doctors helped her write Autobiography? That her fans are predominantly young girls? Not unless you're the sort of person who considers Simpson more "pedestrian" than a bore like Costello, a rock-establishment dinosaur who, for many, continues to represent some sort of ideal.
This is exactly why the backlash has been so brutal. By straying from the so-called fake and feminized realm of pop music to make a rock album, Simpson and her prefab persona threaten to sully the supposedly authentic rock pantheon – a canon that, despite the inclusion of a few women, largely remains the domain of men like Robert Plant, Bob Dylan, and Jack White. As a result, Simpson's detractors have maligned her as a talentless interloper in rock. Rather than come right out and say that, though, they mostly complain that she's unworthy of attention because she can't sing well – as if the wounded-boy warbles of "rock saviors" White and Conor Oberst are somehow more palatable and artful than Simpson's vocals. Such accusations merely distract from the fact that many people hate her for daring to crash rock's boy-clique culture.
Given such relentless attacks, it was refreshing to read a review of Autobiography last fall that took Simpson's SNL appearance with a grain of salt. In the Nov. 12 issue of the Village Voice, Mikael Wood approached the gaffe with the appropriate sense of humor when he wrote that the "only thing Ashlee Simpson did wrong ... was failing to flip off the audience and stage dive onto their heads as soon as her drummer punched whichever button he wasn't supposed to punch."
Indeed, Simpson owes no apologies. After all, contrary to what you probably heard, Autobiography is one of 2004's best albums, establishing her as someone unafraid to express all the chaos, confusion, and contradictions that are part of becoming an adult. To these ears, there's as much emotional resonance in a song like Simpson's "Love Makes the World Go Round" – with lines like "Hold on, it's tragic / Stumbling through all this static," sung in her rasping, Courtney Love-like howl and wrapped in sky-high hooks – as anything by hip-hopper du jour Kanye West or indie-rock cause célèbre the Arcade Fire. Factor in Simpson's immense charm and her wonderfully punked-out, work-in-progress performances, and it's even more maddeningly apparent that she's been maligned simply for not fitting many people's ill-conceived idea of a rock star.
So rather than make excuses or amends for SNL when she comes to San Jose this month on her first headlining tour, let's hope Simpson continues to sing, shout, holler, and scream herself hoarse just to piss off the haters. Because, really, what's more rock 'n' roll than that?
Is this guy for REAL?
White girl can't dance.
Denny Crane: "I want two things. First God and then Fox News."
She is not a real musician. She is simply the creation of a producer. She was never famous for any real talent. As she lives by the sword (press hype), she must also die by the sword.
After all, contrary to what you probably heard, Autobiography is one of 2004's best albums, establishing her as someone unafraid to express all the chaos, confusion, and contradictions that are part of becoming an adult.
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Using this criteria, my new album, Geese Farts on a Muggy Day should qualify for a Lifetime Achievement Award. |
Wait about ten to fifteen years...Papa Simpson will be the 'new' Joe Jackson
she can't sing, period. No journalist/reporter/whatever can make me feel different, when you can't sing you can't sing, I can't sing either but at least I don't pretend that I can (or make loadsa cash with lack of talent....)
She made me cringe at the Orange Bowl (no wait, that was OU that made me cringe).
(To be honest, they didn't sound so hot when the system was working.)
I also think there is something to his suggestion that throwing Ashlee to the sharks is little more than an attempt at "street cred" on the part of some detractors. Ashlee is does not belong to enough "protected categories," and thus she is easily voted out of the boat; think they'd toss out Melissa Etheridge or Janet Jackson for an identical sound malfunction? Oh, I don't think so!
I may be all wet, but given the choice between a performance by the ridiculed Ashlee Simpson or the deified Yoko Ono, I know which one I'd rather be compelled to watch/listen.
well that makes sense then with the pic i saw of Jessica on the Dukes of Hazzard thread yesterday. her chest looked smaller and her ribs were showing, i was surprised, bc i didn't recall her being so thin.
Yes...I guess it is some type of formula. Big chest, washboard abs, no hips, skinny legs and arms, hollowed out cheekbones...not as nature intends (note to male FReepers--breast tissue=fat tissue, fat tissue makes rounder hips, fuller legs, etc). What a shame...Jessica (dumb blonde act notwithstanding) is actually very talented. Too bad they just couldn't leave her be the way she was...
Oh, I see! It's our fault. We're all simple-minded sexists who hate women. Yeah, that's the ticket.
I swear, these liberal writing putzes are one trick ponies. If you don't agree with their view, why your a racist, a homophobe, a sexist. Get lost, moron!
yes the breathy simpleton act gets to me, but i thought she was attractive before. the antithesis of the skeletal Laura Flynn Boyle, whose disturbing pix were on her thread yesterday. EEKS!
Maybe Paula Abdul will take pity on her and teach her a few steps.
Yes I think he's for real. The worst thing for a pop celebrity to do is refer to themselves or try to be a rock musicican. Pop celebrities should be happy with the money and fame they have --- but when they take themselves too seriously, they're going to be mocked.
No need to wait, He already is. And by building up his no-talent daughter on the tail of his talented daughter, everybody makes money. Everybody is happy. The world has someone to laugh at, the punks have someone to admire, and finally, when the charade is over and Ashley is discarded, will anyone notice?
No one except Ashley. Maybe.
I'm confussed. Is this guy teh funny or teh stupid?
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