Posted on 01/14/2005 9:22:46 AM PST by TheBigB
Woo hoo! TGIF! Time for the official FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD! As always, feel free to post funny pics, jokes, nonsensical statements, or even to IGNORE THIS THREAD! Also, don't hesitate to ping your own lists! All are welcome!
To kick things off...
Yes, this really exists... 
What are/were your favorite Saturday morning cartoons? :-)
If you'll give me your credit card number, I'll bill you $4.95 for posting your picture for you.
Alligator Shoes
A young blonde was on vacation and driving through the Everglades .
She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle on prices" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator, so I can get a pair of shoes for free!"
The shopkeeper said with a sly, knowing smile, "Little lady, just go and give it a try!" The blonde headed out toward the swamps, determined to catch an alligator.
Later in the day, as the shopkeeper is driving home, he pulls over to the side of the levee where he spots that same young woman standing waist deep in the murky bayou water, shotgun in hand.
Just then, he spots a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning speed, she takes aim, kills the creature and hauls it onto the slimy bank of the swamp.
Lying nearby were 7 more of the dead creatures, all lying on their backs. The shopkeeper stood on the bank, watching in silent amazement.
The blonde struggled and flipped the gator onto its back. Rolling her eyes heaven-ward and screaming in great frustration, she shouts out ..
"SH*T... THIS ONE'S BAREFOOT TOO!"
A husband walks into Frederick's of Hollywood to purchase some sheer lingerie for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price, the more sheer, the higher the price. He opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500 and takes the lingerie home. He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on nd model it for him. Upstairs, the wife thinks, "I have an idea. It's so sheer that it Might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow and keep the $500 refund for myself." So she appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose. The husband says, "Good Heavens! You'd think that for $500, they'd at least iron it!"
bttt
good one......!!!!!!!!
I'll raise your jackass with a rocket in his rear end with one of my own.(warning semi nudity and extreme stupidity). I figure this guy has to be a democrat. (BTW, it's a numbered sequence, photos 1-4. Change the photo number in the url to see the entire sequence.
Don't go to the Hall of DoucheBags if laughing out loud would attract undue attention.
D, I can't tell, is that teddy kennedy or johnnie baldacci?
I received a The Marx Brothers Silver Screen Collection These will cause severe aching in the sides from laughing! 
OMG!!! I really did have to look twice.
"Ahhhh, bitter beer face."
Here's another:
Norwegian Yoke
Ole is a farmer in Visconsin. He is in need of a new milk cow and hears about a nice one for sale over in Minnesota. He drives to Minnesota, looks at the cow, reaches under to see if she gives milk.
When he grabs the teat and pulls, the cow farts.
Ole is very surprised, looks at the farmer who is selling the cow, then reaches under the cow to try again. He grabs another teat, pulls, and the cow farts again.
Milk does come out, however, so after some discussion, Ole decides to buy the cow and take it home.
He calls over his neighbor, Sven, and says, "Hey Sven, come and look at dis here new cow I yust bought. Pull her teat, and see vat happens."
Sven reaches under, pulls the teat, and the cow farts.
Sven looks at Ole and says, "You bought dis cow in Minnesota, yah?"
Ole is very surprised and says, "Yah, dats right. But how did you know?"
Sven says, "My wife is from Minnesota."
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