Ask Dog Lady: Fake testicles tell more about your boyfriend than your dog (very funny)

TownOnline ^ | 1/5/04 | Rachel & Dog Lady

[pissant]

This is too funny. And they get Rush's endorsement to boot!! I think we need to take up a collection and send them to all the GOP senators in Washington. They're sorely missing!!!

[1Old Pro]

send them to all the GOP senators in Washington.

Great idea.

[Prime Choice]

Might do Frist & Co. a world of good!

I hope they come with a matching spine. Frist needs that, too.

[Fierce Allegiance]

I think this is worthy of an ISHP.

[Bikers4Bush]

If he really wanted the dog to feel better he'd have bought him some that were the size of oranges.

[7.62 x 51mm]

Darned great idea!

[rockabyebaby]

lmao funny stuff!

[Knitting A Conundrum]

Now this is just weirder than I can deal with...People actually need advice about this sort of stuff??? People actually sell this sort of stuff?

[mcg1969]

http://www.neuticles.com/index1.html

"The ASPCA implores pet owners to neuter- but what about the emasculated pet? Now there's Neuticles!"
The Daily Show

"Medical Miracle? Procedure protects pets masculinity"
News Enterprise

"Neuticles are just plain neat!"
Rush Limbaugh

"Now only Fido's veterinarian will know for sure."
The Kansas City Star

"Neuticles are a fix for the fix."
United Features Syndicate

"Neutered dogs have new reason to bark."
The Idaho Stateman

"A re-invention of the mousetrap."
Paul Harvey

"Testicular implants ease trauma of neutering."
The Arizona Republic

[Luddite Patent Counsel]

From the neuticles.com web site:

"Two Neuticles models are available in multiple sizes- differing only in firmness levels. Each model replicates the pets testicle in size, shape and approximate weight. Over 100,000 canines, felines, equine and other pets have been altered Worldwide without a single reported complication when implanted as directed and minimal post operative cautions are employed.


NeuticlesOriginal®
FDA medically-approved (for human use) Polypropylene homopolymere-resembles plastic in firmness.

NeuticlesNatural®
FDA medically-approved (for human use) solid silicone replicates pets testes in firmness."

Replicates pets testes in firmness? I want to nominate the guy who had to verify this for the Popular Science "worst job" award.

[MediaMole]

"Da B#tches think my pitbull's neuticles be phat."
Snoop Dogg

[krb]

The gift of Neuticles was utterly inappropriate, even offensive.

BS. It was funny as he!!.

[skeeter]

The Dog Lady is as nutty as Monty.

[pissant]

"Replicates pets testes in firmness? I want to nominate the guy who had to verify this for the Popular Science "worst job""

It's gotta be at least a runner up!

[xm177e2]

When I tell him I don't want to put Magic through this operation, Monty gets miffed and says he already paid $85 for the Neuticles online and doesn't want to return them. Despite being so worried about losing the money, he insists he'll pay the full freight for the surgery at the vet.

So obviously, it's not about the money.

I think the real issue is that this lady wants to castrate her boyfriend, not the dog. She's subconsciously finding a reason to hate him so she can mistreat him.

He should run away as fast as he can.

[kaktuskid]

A job rivaling bull semen collector??

[The Loan Arranger]

"If he really wanted the dog to feel better he'd have bought him some that were the size of oranges." Darn it, my secret is out.....

[HairOfTheDog]

Ohfercryinoutloud!

Ping!