To: bentfeather; snippy_about_it; Flurry; Darksheare; Darkchylde; Trikebuilder; radu; Colonel_Flagg; ...
I Saw Myself on TV Today

I saw myself on TV today.
I am the one with perfect hair-- no grey, no split ends or flyaways.
I am the one with the natural highlights-- the ones from a bottle, a spray.
I always smell baby powder fresh. Or is it petal fresh?
I am the one wearing a diaper no one can see.
I am the one wearing "wings".
I am the perfect woman-- eating only low-fat cereal.
My teeth are bleach-white, no cavities.
I floss and I brush.
No wrinkles will you find- I "fight" my age.
A blemish? Eek! No..a lotion for that.
My children are perfect, blonde with 10 fingers and toes.
My house is always clean, my furniture new.
I am the one with the perky boobs, no hips, thighs or ass.
I am feminine with no feminine itching or odor.
My clothes are perfect, they match with no wrinkles.
I drink diet pop, eat diet foods, and Lean Cuisine.
I am always smiling, twirling and laughing-- preferably in a field of flowers.
EXCEPT when I am bloated and cramping-- of course there is a pill for that.
I am in charge of soft towels, fresh sheets and stain removal.
My makeup is perfect, my lipstick won't smug.
I have 20-20 vision or wear lenses, no glasses for me.
I don't sweat, I don't smell.
I have no heartburn or gas-- there are pills for that.
I have no corns, no bunions, no warts- there are pads for those.
I lost 5 pounds in 5 days- pills and liquids diets are my friends.
My skin is soft and supple.
I am the victim-- when am I the hero?
I am the comedian-- or am the butt of your jokes?
I am a lover-- or am I just a whore?
I am straight, I am white.
When am I a woman? womyn?
When am I African, Asian...?
When am I short?
When am I fat?
When am I using a wheelchair?
When am I my age?
When am I human?
When am I me?
I saw myself on TV today.
Clover_Patch
Johnmiserable failureKerry
872 posted on
07/17/2004 7:56:54 AM PDT by
SAMWolf
(The dentist said my wisdom teeth were retarded.)
To: SAMWolf
Morning Sam,
I Saw Myself on TV Today
Ain't this the truth?
What you up to today?? No rain in sight here today, Woo hoo!
Thanks for the tunes, poetry, and Breakfast in the Lair.
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