I'm mortified that one of my weakest in the arsenal was listed, but what the heck, here's the whole storehouse for pilfering... (I think I got all the racy ones...)
Hey!, Whats this gooey liquid?! Mmmm smells good, feels li... IT BURNS!! AAAHHHGGGG!!!
Hey!, I wonder whats in this cave?! Lets check it ou... YAAAAA...chomp chomp... BUUURRRPPP.
Watch it, you don't want to getcher tie caught in that fan be... GEEUURKK!
Quick! SQUASH IT! SQUASH IT NOW!!!
Hey, look at that little critter...Yaaaa! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!!!!
So many marketing pinheads, so few grenades...
Eschew Obfuscation.
So the DU guy says, oh yea? I changed a lightbulb once... alone... rotating the house was a bitch..
2 DUers walk into a bar..They were still there by the door, out cold, when I came out an hour later.
Hyuck! Ah member whenct ah cut off a haid onect.
DEEEeeeee YEEEWWW! that SMAILS!
Honey, did you give the cat its pill??? WHY IS THERE A VACUUM CLEANER HOSE IN ITS REAR END?!?!
I betcha that P3 sounded like a mower boggin down on tall grass when it hit that J8...
Happiness is a hammer and a jar of smurfs...
Chain mail...check. Kevlar vest...Check. Leather Gloves...Check. Begin running the cats bathwater...
This here's Billy Bob, O' tha Borg, Ya'll fixin' ta be 'similated...
I am Ewmer Fudd, of Borg, Pwepawe to be asswimiwated.
I certainly hope you didn't adopt that chicken from an animal shelter under false pretences...
Seeing the palm sized spider on the outhouse wall AFTER you're commited SUCKS!
Redneck Rampage, 'Cause any game that says "ya got time to git likkered up" during install is COOL!
Wow, there sure are a lot of...SNEEZE...bacteria...SNEEZE...in this crap!
This is my tagline. I love my tagline very much. It talks to me at night, softly...quietly...
Snuggle Bear meets Mossberg... Balance is restored to the world...
Yakboy made me put this tag here, I swear it!
Why do Republicans play hardball like little girls...?
If you don't stop all this litigation, I'll sue you.
Part your hair with a turnip, and the world will smile with you.
Too-Tough Turtle Talked Turkey To The Troubled Twin Troubadors' Tutor.
There is nothing like walking in space.
I've reckoned the number of the beast; it is your MasterCharge number.
If you believe it, then it MUST be true. Sorry for thinking otherwise.
Totalitarianism = Oppression of Freedom... it's real simple, kids.
It is only the slaughtered who have trusted the Butcher.
Natural Resources are a Terrible Thing to Waste.
Who cares how many cumquats it takes... get over it.
Two people can screw in a lightbulb... but in a really BIG lightbulb.
Golly, Guess Good Gambling Games Get Gregarious Gary Going Great Guns.
So many marketing pinheads, so few hand grenades.
Heinlien's immortal words on Space Travel: "LET'S GO!!!!"
There's nothing you can do that someone won't try to charge you for.
Tits: seen one, you seen 'em both.
but I still _feel_ free... maybe you should try shooting me again.
Cats are better than TV.
Hey, you!! Yeah, you!!! What the hell do you think you're doing?!?!
Truk paa livet, Livet paa truk
Nyet, nyet... Ya ney znayu... kak eta?
"Lorena, I meant that you should stop selling Richard any more drinks"
Ask not what your computer can do for you but what you can do with it.
rain.rain.rain.rain.rain.rain.rain.rain....huh? Did you say something?
Great Balls of Fire: a kind of clap you get from your 13yr old cousin.
Life is a Game, with Nothing to be won or lost... except Everything.
My girlfriend overheard my concubine telling my wife about my mistress
-----> This statement is a lie. <-----
Take a chance! Colombus did! Look where it got him! ... He's DEAD!!!
Sandy Slopes Slip Serendipitously, So Stop Saying Sally Starts Slides.
Fourteen hamsters can't be wrong.
Let go of my throat, I'm trying to be clever.
Stand up, you can rock the boat all you want... make sure you can swim
that's " -> WHY <- would they...", for the unfortunately humored
InterNet: the BEST set of cans-and-string a boy ever had!
Give me Liberty, or Give me a six pack of Bud... I'm easy ...NOT
Wally Works With Walls, While Wendy Wipes Windows
The first rule of politics: shoot the competent.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but a couple of hookers can be real fun
A hook in the nostril is God's way of telling you that you're hosed.
Sometimes you just gotta kill 'em to teach 'em how to live right.
You know you've made it big-time when God steals your tag-lines.
A fish is just like a donkey, only completly different.
Never let a midget take a crap in your slippers.
Three times a week can be enough... unless it isn't.
Redundant Tautologies are Reiterated over and over again...
Your head is so far up your ass that you look normal.
It is difficult to capture the Gestalt of a concept in an English word
This is a random insult... except that it's meant for YOU.
***k Democracy... we actually want to get something done!
My nose is cold, but at least it's not brown.
run, trip, fall, stand, run, trip, fall, stand, run, trip, fall, stand
NO! Never!! Absolutly not!!! Completely impossible!!!! ...well, maybe
Is there any reason why you have that sticking up your nose?
Awake! Awake! The Day doth Break... like your Head from a Billyclub.
I wish those voices would stop telling me to write all of this.
I think you're getting athlete's tounge.
Quid Clarius Astris.
Either GREP and GROK, or GROPE and GRIPE
You can lead a horse to water, but aim dead-on once it is drinking.
Never put anything larger than your elbow in your ear.
You may be right, but not if I have anything to do about it.
._ _.__ .... . ._.. ._.. ___ .__ ___ ._. ._.. _..
foxtrot uniform charlie kilo india tango alpha lima lima.
Remember: A cloudy day is nature's way of making it a cloudy day.
A weakness is only a weakness if you don't know it exists.
I wish I may, I wish I might ...have pizza for my dinner tonight.
Be all that you can Be... but Be home before dark.
FishPacketSlapHappyDogRunBlueMonkeyMoneyGreenSpamJustForYou
Permitting Petty Perniciousness Piques Pushy Patty Pretty Permanently.
I've begun to wonder why there is a badger attached to my big toe.
There is nothing like putting an ice cream cone in your armpit.
Don't think that the salamander is going to help you now.
Raindrops keep falling on my head, and its driving me MAD, I tell you!
If you think THAT'S funny, wait till you see the mess on your carpet.
I know you hate taglines ...that's why I use them.
TV sucks, like a $10 hooker on a bad night.
Are you sure this will help? It smells pretty bad.
My mind went to the BBS, and all I got was a lousy tag-line.
Now with something EXTRA that TINGLES
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left.
I Kant understand the Transendental Aesthetic.
Take me out to the Ballgame, Mug me, and Leave me bleeding in a Ditch.
Why Waste Wanton Words? We Want Wicked Ways Which Will Worry William.
Bulls**t in China: shop.
convivabor tamquam MIM ... non
Confucious say: man who gets wisdom from tagline is often big dummy
Don't forget to remember what it is you want to remember not to forget
Today's special: Hedgehog in claypot, with special taste.
Life belongs to the Living.
Two Terrible Teenage Troublemakers Taunted The Touchy Trailmaster.
When the Dragon lands, It was already There.
Color isn't in the photon; it's in the perception.
Sing a song of sixteen dollars (pensively).....inflation is a bitch.
Tag! Your line is 'It'!
Despite Depression, Doubtfull Dan Dons Di's Darling Daughter's Dress
Carrie Could Continue Casually Contrasting Coat Costs, Confided Chris.
.. .../.. -/-- . --..--/--- .-. /-.. --- . .../- .... .. .../... --- ..- -. -../..-. ..- -. -. -.-- ..--..
Metus improbos compescit, non clementia. (Fear, not kindness, restrains the wicked.)
And you don't want to stand below where the cows roost :)
For mad scientists who keep brains in jars, here's a tip: add a slice of lemon for freshness.
Housework is a snap, since I realized, "Hey! I'm a guy!"
Contents may have settled during shipping, but this tagline contains the stated product weight.
If not McClintock, then let ButtMunch have it so the D's can circle the bowl until flush completion.
you can't take a kid away from her parents just because they're stupid. If we did that, what would we do with all the liberals' children?
Oh, look! It's the government, pretending that they care about people!
That was great I needed that. The ones about not giving up were what I needed. Also I was thinking about changing mine to: "Everybody has a purpose in life, your's may be as an example to others" I feel that way right about now.
Thanks, jigsaw!!