Whats the matter with me? Has anything changed?

To: ConservativeMan55

OK, here's some advice from an old matron (married 27 years) with teenage kids of her own (boy and girl).

1. The Zen Issue. You have to wrap your mind around the concept that trying to "get a girl" is self-defeating. The more desperate you appear to be to ask girls out simply for the sake of asking them out, the more you repel them. Don't try too hard. Remember the law of supply and demand.

2. In order to avoid looking desperate, you need to find something you honestly enjoy doing and can participate in whole-heartedly, where you will incidentally run into folks who enjoy the same things you do . . . some of whom will be female. The best relationships begin in a common interest and then (God willing) move on to friendship and then affection. My husband to be and I shared common interests in fireworks making and Scottish Country Dancing. Go figure. Only you can decide what you like, and pretending to like something you don't will only expose you as a fraud. Church activities, dog training, carpentry, hunting, gardening . . . u pick 'em, but you have to get out of the house and get BUSY.

3. The side effect of getting involved in whatever activities you choose is that you'll think less about yourself and your supposed plight, and more about enjoying whatever it is you decided to do. And helping the other people involved in the activity do whatever it is. Which makes you a more attractive person to the opposite sex - friendly, involved, helpful. If you do see somebody you like, get on the same committees but don't push it too hard, and wait to see what develops.

If you follow this idea enthusiastically, I think you'll be surprised at how much happier you'll be . . . even if you DON't meet "Ms. Always Right" right off the bat. You'll acquire a circle of friends too, and they all have friends . . . and so forth. Give it a shot.

41 posted on 04/15/2004 7:11:59 PM PDT by AnAmericanMother (. . . Ministrix of Venery (recess appointment), TTGC Ladies' Auxiliary . . .)

LOL...Every time I call my grandmother she keeps asking 'having babies yet?'

42 posted on 04/15/2004 7:12:01 PM PDT by cyborg (Frakenfreude Radio... look out belowwwwwwwwwww!)

Happen to have a spare? ;-)

43 posted on 04/15/2004 7:12:01 PM PDT by RosieCotton (Anything worth doing is worth doing badly. - G. K. Chesterton)

I'm too afraid of the NYC dating scene... which perhaps can be as dismal as the rural areas.

44 posted on 04/15/2004 7:13:15 PM PDT by cyborg (Frakenfreude Radio... look out belowwwwwwwwwww!)

Whoever lives the closest to Ohio gets him!....:)

45 posted on 04/15/2004 7:14:01 PM PDT by LisaMalia (In Memory of Sgt. James W."Billy" Lunsford..KIA 11-29-69 Binh Dinh S. Vietnam)

That is one way to get women. It's also a good way to pick up a veneral disease.

46 posted on 04/15/2004 7:15:44 PM PDT by July 4th (You need to click "Abstimmen")

Looking at your Free Republic homepage, if that's you with the red veil (underneath the picture of the old lady talking on the phone), then you are DEFINITELY no ugly!

47 posted on 04/15/2004 7:15:49 PM PDT by Born Conservative (It really sucks when your 15 minutes of fame comes AFTER you're gone...)

To: ConservativeMan55

BTW, you're a guy. A guy who is only 22. I am a 30 year old female, and chicks have a shelf life in more ways than one. Don't get too depressed.

48 posted on 04/15/2004 7:15:58 PM PDT by cyborg (Frakenfreude Radio... look out belowwwwwwwwwww!)

To: Born Conservative

*LOL* I wish I had Lil Kim's body (we're the same height hehehe)

49 posted on 04/15/2004 7:16:37 PM PDT by cyborg (Frakenfreude Radio... look out belowwwwwwwwwww!)

To: ConservativeMan55

You like to freep, you like to read, you like to watch the news.

That's just fine for us old farts, but if you want a girlfriend, you're going to need to spend more time out in the three-dimensional world. Take up a sport or work on a political campaign, you'll meet some people and do yourself some good.

50 posted on 04/15/2004 7:17:11 PM PDT by hellinahandcart

To: ConservativeMan55

You've been moved to chat, now you'll never get a girl.

51 posted on 04/15/2004 7:18:26 PM PDT by socal_parrot

To: hellinahandcart

Yessssssss you're right (but I don't think you're an old fart!)

52 posted on 04/15/2004 7:18:45 PM PDT by cyborg (Frakenfreude Radio... look out belowwwwwwwwwww!)

To: ConservativeMan55

By the way... sorry if I sounded too sarcastic or blunt in my last comment.

I am 36 and we have the same affliction, but I have gotten to the point that it doesn't bother me anymore. If it happens, it happens.

Just relax and start enjoying life.

Happy Birthday and best wishes.

53 posted on 04/15/2004 7:18:51 PM PDT by SaveTheChief (The most crooked, you know, lying...)

To: Born Conservative

54 posted on 04/15/2004 7:19:20 PM PDT by cyborg (Frakenfreude Radio... look out belowwwwwwwwwww!)

To: ConservativeMan55

Well damn...I always thought about hittin' on you myself. I thought the "55" at the end of your name was your birth year like mine :) *whew*

55 posted on 04/15/2004 7:19:21 PM PDT by Sunshine55 (Bush-Cheney 2004...By George, we've got ourselves a President!)

To: RosieCotton; cyborg

Well, I would give you my sons e-mail but it makes me nervous when he plays in my territory. 30, straight, single, good looking, navy career guy. Just too picky.

56 posted on 04/15/2004 7:20:32 PM PDT by CindyDawg

Hey Sunshine! See my post #34. Looks like we Ohio dames think alike.....:)

57 posted on 04/15/2004 7:21:06 PM PDT by LisaMalia (In Memory of Sgt. James W."Billy" Lunsford..KIA 11-29-69 Binh Dinh S. Vietnam)

To: ConservativeMan55

Everytime I talk to a girl she is either taken, or not interested.

You just have to realize that somewhere there are girls who feel just like you --- not sure how to find the right mate --- the hard part if finding them. Widen your circle of friends and get involved in interesting group activities --- take classes they might be taking. I knew someone who started a club after looking for one to join and found there were none, setting the criteria for membership to include those who might be eligible (christian never-married young adults), sent flyers out (through churches) --- and that worked.

58 posted on 04/15/2004 7:21:32 PM PDT by FITZ

To: ConservativeMan55

Take my wife........please?

59 posted on 04/15/2004 7:22:03 PM PDT by Hatteras

To: SaveTheChief

Its ok. I understand.

60 posted on 04/15/2004 7:29:26 PM PDT by ConservativeMan55 (There is no problem so great that it cannot be solved with high powered explosives.)

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