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They dipped their paddles stealthily into the water.
The fog was lifting, cutting their advantage in stealth severely.
With any luck, they'd pull close to their quarry in just a few seconds and..
"Away Borders!" yelled the tallest of the small advance group as they pulled alongside the canoeing campers.
"Who ARE you people?!" screamed the woman in the canoe, her man-friend ineffectually sitting slack jawed and helpless in all his metrosexual glory.
the mosquitos were eating him alive and any distraction was a good distracton.
Even if it did come from a groups of camo'd men climbing aboard his canoe and..
"Hey! That's MY beer!"
"Too bad poofy, it's ours now!" and with that vicious laugh the freebooters grabbed poofyguy's paddle and threw it to the salmon.
"Go fetch!"
For his credit, the poofy Metro-boy jumped into the water with a splash and was instantly set upon by hungry spawning salmon.
His amozonian borderline butch lesbian girlfriend had come to her senses during the raid and was now attempting to do a Ben-Hur style ramming attack on the closest of the pirate canoes.
"Ar!" all eyes were on her as she made a glancing blow to the side of the pirate canoe 'Singing Salmon'.
"Keel haul her!"

OK... back in the closet.. Come on now...in, in, in.. good boy...

Sheeeeesh.. who let you out again?

The rugged Northwest outdoors is no place for a metroboy - why, most wilderness areas still don't have shopping malls yet. You have to stay in the city to find an Eddie Bauer store.