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Puff_List ^ | 10/24/03 | francisandbeans

[Just another Joe]

Couple of Bocks, maybe?

[Conspiracy Guy]

See post 4 also.

[Argh]

I saw those also. Nice shot at Bill!

[Conspiracy Guy]

I rewrote #13 because Joe said that the devil sold his soul to Hillary.

[doubled]

Couple of Bocks, maybe?

As Gov. Arnold would say, "Bock to bock bocks."

[Argh]

You suppose that's what she did with the 100K she "made" in cattle futures? Nah, it must have been before that.

[Conspiracy Guy]

you did see i fixed the pome on # 13 per your advice?

[Conspiracy Guy]

It was way back

[SandyEgo]

Stop me if you've heard this one before...

There was an attorney who got home late one evening after a very taxing day trying to get a stay of execution for a client, named Gene Wright, who was due to be hanged for murder at midnight. His last minute plea for clemency to the state governor had failed and he was feeling tired and
depressed.

As soon as he got through the door his wife started on about, "What time of night do you call this? Where the hell have you been?" and so on.

Too shattered to play his usual role in this familiar ritual, he went and poured himself a very large whisky and headed off to the bathroom for a long hot soak -- pursued by the predictable sarcastic remarks.

While he was in the bath the phone rang, which the wife answered and was told that her husband's client had been granted his stay of execution after all. Realizing what a day he must have had, she relented a little and went
upstairs to give him the good news. As she opened the bathroom door she was greeted by the sight of her husband's rear view as he bent naked over the bath cleaning the tub.

"They're not hanging Wright tonight," she said.

At which the attorney whirled round and screamed hysterically, "For crying out loud . . . don't you ever stop?"

[Conspiracy Guy]

Right after she broke up with Vince and married Bill even though she was ... you know.

[Just another Joe]

Bwahahahaha
I've had days like that.

[Texan5]

Hi, Joe! May I have a Miller Lite ? I left early and have an hour or so to burn...

[nothingnew]

you did see i fixed the pome on # 13 per your advice?

POME:

HI

BYE

FMCDH (sorry...must be FRieday...)

[Conspiracy Guy]

Short but it does rhyme.

[aaaDOC]

Hi Joe. Make mine an Anchor Steam and a Montecristo No. 4.

Here are a few laughs for everyone.

The Halloween Party

Bob and Mary Smith were invited to a swanky masked Halloween Ball.

Mary had a terrible headache the night of the party, and told Bob to go without her.

Bob, a devoted husband, protested, but Mary argued, saying she was going to take two aspirin and go to bed.  There was no need for her husband to miss out on a good time.  So, he took his costume and away he went.

After an hours nap, Mary awoke feeling great!  It was still early...she decided to go the party.  Having kept her costume a secret from her husband, Mary decided to have a little fun.  She would see how Bob behaved when she was not with him.

Mary joined the party and soon spotted her husband on the dance floor, dancing with every chick that he could, and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there.

Mary sidled up to him.  She was no slouch in the Babe department.

Wearing her most seductive smile, she easily got his attention.  She was careful not to talk too much as her voice could be a dead give-away.  He left his latest partner high and dry and devoted his attentions to the new stuff that had just arrived.  Mary let him go as far as he wished; he was, after all, her husband.  When he whispered a little proposition in her ear she agreed.

Off they went to the parking lot, and the first back seat they could find.

As the clock chimed midnight, Mary slipped away without revealing her identity.  She went home, put her costume away and got into bed.  Mary was more than curious as to how Bob was going to describe his evening.

She grabbed a book and pretended to be reading when he came home.

Casually, she asked what kind of evening he had had.

"Oh, the same old thing.  You know I never have a good time when you're not there."

Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"

He replied, "I tell you, I never danced a dance.  When I got there, I met Pete, Bill and Charlie.  We went into the den and played poker all evening.  But you're not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my costume to!

-----------------------------------

Troublemaker

I went to the store the other day, and I was in there for only 5 minutes.

When I came out, there was a damn motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket.  So I went up to him and said, "Come on, buddy, how can you give me a ticket for parking just 5 minutes?  He ignored me and continued writing the ticket.

So I called him a pencil-necked Nazi.

He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tires!

So I called him a piece of horse sh*t.

He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first.

Then he started writing a third ticket!

This went on for about 20 minutes...the more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote.

I didn't care.  My car was parked around the corner.

I try to have a little fun each day.

It's important

---------------------------------
At the parish school


The old pastor made it to a practice to visit the parish school one day a week

He walked into the 4th grade class, where the children were studying the states, and asked them how many states they could name.

They came up with about 40 names.

He jokingly told them that in his day students knew the names of all the states.

One lad snickered, "Yes, but in those days there were only 13"....

-------------------------------------------

Funny Thoughts:

"The fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses.  They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright Brothers.  But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown."

--Carl Sagan

---------------------------------------

The Earthquake

A big earthquake with the strength of 9.1 on the Richter scale has hit Mexico.

Two million Mexicans have died and over a million are injured

The country is totally ruined and the government doesn't know where to start with providing help to rebuild.

The rest of the world is in shock.

Canada is sending troopers to help the Mexican army control the riots.

The European community (except France) is sending food and money.

The United States, not to be outdone, is sending two million replacement Mexicans.

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Have a Great Weekend!