Posted on 02/02/2025 2:29:43 PM PST by DFG
DALLAS, TX — Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban woke up this morning incredibly hungover and hoping he didn't do anything dumb last night, like maybe trade away his franchise player for a pair of shoes.
"Man, I hope I didn't do anything really stupid last night," said Cuban, downing ibuprofen. "Hm, wonder why I have so many missed calls from Luka? And what's the deal with all these calls from L.A.?"
Though his memory was foggy from a heavy night of drinking, Cuban began to remember several concerning snapshots, such as coaches saying "That is the dumbest idea in history" and "You just traded our star player for arthritis."
"Must have been a weird dream," chuckled Cuban. "Maybe I called and teased Luka about a trade. I gotta lay off the whiskey. Ha, can you imagine if I gave away Luka?"
At publishing time, Cuban had again woken up hungover, hoping that he hadn't done anything else weird like dress as a lesbian to travel around stumping for an imbecilic politician.
He no longer owns the team.
The happiest man in Dallas is Jerry Jones, “I’m no longer the worst owner in Dallas!”
Is the second part of this statement true? Serious question. Does Cuban still control basketball operations?
He doesn’t need a hangover to make stupid decisions.
Doncic for Anthony Edwards, a player who spends the majority of the season in street clothes.
Is he still living on us soil?
He owns 27% and is the managing partner.
The Mavs are owned by the Addlison family who also owns a Las Vegas casino. Rumors on Twitter are that they want to trash the Mavs and move it to Vegas.
I think the NBA wanted to do something to get ratings up in LA. I doubt this will work well.
Lakers have nothing on defense. Luka sure won’t help there.
That was my first thought. That and the incredible amount of whining we will hear.
Be funny if both teams miss the playoffs.
The Celtics play the Mavs on Thursday. Looking forward to that. Wish I could be in the garden to hear the chants.
Babylon Bee.
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