[MayflowerMadam]

“those with children who dismiss complaints from their children as ‘growing pains’ should pay closer attention to any complaints”

My dad gave me that growing pains diagnosis when I was 10. I almost died. (My doctor told my school nurse that I was “the sickest child he ever saw that didn’t die”.) Osteomyelitis.

Six months flat on my back in a full body cast in the hospital. Then a lifetime of surgeries and other crap.

People need to listen to their kids, Covid or not. I never forgave him for basically calling me a liar. What kind of a father does that?

[CFW]

“(My doctor told my school nurse that I was “the sickest child he ever saw that didn’t die”.) Osteomyelitis.”

_____

Oh my! That’s scary indeed. I’m glad you survived.

I had a distance relative (by marriage) at aged 11 who had leg pains after a normal baseball game. His parents also thought it was the normal pains of childhood, but took him to the doctor after it persisted for a week. They discovered it was leukemia after a barrage of tests. He lived another two years with treatment.

However, my sons often complained of pains and I took them to the doctor if it seemed serious. The diagnosis was always muscle-strain or over-exertion and both are healthy to this day. The exact same symptoms exist for the same—muscle strain and leukemia—when do you take the child to the doctor, and when do you tell them to take a hot shower? It’s hard to know.

But, forgive your dad. Forgiveness if only for yourself so you don’t carry that weight with you into the future. I suspect if you spoke to him seriously about it, he feels more guilt than you realize since he nearly lost his son because he dismissed your complaints.

[Hiddigeigei]

"Six months flat on my back in a full body cast in the hospital. Then a lifetime of surgeries and other crap."
Somewhat similar, but my mother saved me by insisting I go to a hospital. In the sixth grade I had pain right under Mcburney's Point, but the doctor insisted I was malingering from school. Six days later in the hospital my appendix ruptures, and since the pain eased, the doctor was going to send me home. Fortunately, the hospital brought in a surgeon who opened me up. Well over six months in the hospital with tubes draining the puss, and once even months later walking down the street in town, it opened up and blood and puss covered my pants. Later operation for adhesions, but seventy five years alter I still have pains. I haven't trusted doctors since.

[Secret Agent Man]

Well put it this way, if he was generally a good caring dad otherwise, he just screwed up majorly in this instance. If he was generally otherwise not a good caring dad, then he was just a horrible parent.