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Posted on 09/23/2022 11:29:46 AM PDT by DFG
TLANTA, GA. — While speaking at a public symposium on behalf of The Association of Donut Lovers, Georgia Governor Stacey Abrams claimed obesity was just numbers manufactured by her bathroom scale.
"In the same way the patriarchy invented sonograms with fake heartbeat sounds to force women to fall in love with their unborn children against their will, bathroom scales were also created by the patriarchy to control women's bodies," said Abrams. "Obesity isn't real, but a system of oppression. It's time to dismantle it!"
The incumbent governor's remarks are already being praised as "so brave" and "super scientific" by members of the body positivity movement who have not yet succumbed to diabetes and heart disease.
"As Presidential candidate for the Democratic party, I vow to fight the lobbyists of Big Bathroom Scales and their attempts to control our beautiful bodies," said Abrams while inhaling a tower of strawberry-sprinkled bear claws.
A representative for the Bathroom Scale industry issued a statement that read, "We're so busted, dang it. President-elect Stacey Abrams caught us red-handed. We solemnly vow henceforth to do better to hide our secretive desires to control women's bodies."
At publishing time, U.S. President Stacey Abrams had declared every day National Deep-Fried Twinkie Day.
Tell that to whoever she sits on.
When Stacey gets in a car, she blows out the tires which are more black than she is. It is racism I tell you.
You know there are Lefties scheming on how to deal eith the Bee like what was done to Scott Adams (Dilbert).
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!
Reporting from Fatlanta.
LOL!
Ouch....oweeeeee .. that’s gonna leave a mark. Well played, BB!
Ha...maybe the software in her wifi state of the art industrial 10Tonn scale is by Dominion.
Someone in the neighborhood just gained 100lbs.
Stacy got lost in Columbus Georgia and couldn’t find Highway 185. Finally totally frustrated she walked into a shopette and asked “ How do I get to 185?”. The guy behind the counter said “Diet and exercise, diet and exercise!”
I would wager 500+
Which leg?
Lordy how I love The Bee
Her results classify her as having supermassive black hole potential...
Our entire solar system is in big trouble...
I'd be willing to bet that she buys her clothes at Atlanta Tent and Awning.
That manufactured sound she hears are the people she ate banging SOS on the pipes hoping to get rescued.
Lol
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