Posted on 05/01/2021 8:19:49 AM PDT by Starman417
Joe recently had a meltdown after reading from his teleprompter at a local movie drive in theater when his face mask went missing. He panicked and called the FBI for assistance. Unfortunately, 12 crack FBI agents were already preoccupied kicking down the door of an innocent couple in Alaska because the armed G-men erroneously thought that the Huepers snatched Pelosi’s laptop during their visit to the Capital on January 6. Wow. What happened to the FBI? They used to be the gold standard for law enforcement, and now they appear to be mimicking the Keystone Cops on steroids. Also, I didn’t even know that Pelosi’s laptop was missing. I thought that story was a suburban myth, but apparently someone actually snatched the device. Thanks, FBI, for the update! The media quickly debunked the story and surprisingly (not) it disappeared down the memory hole. Can you imagine the deep, dark, secrets hiding on that hard drive? That’s probably why another 7 FBI agents recently tore up Giuliani’s apartment. They may have received an anonymous tip from someone’s flying monkeys that Rudy was hiding her laptop under his bed.
Anyway, back to the case of Joe’s missing surgical mask. Dr. Jill jumped to the rescue and after an exhaustive search, found Joe’s mask hiding in his pocket. Whew, crisis averted. Just another televised sorry spectacle that should have world leaders wondering just who is running our government. Joe, who is entrusted with our nuclear codes and according to Psaki is “fit as a fiddle,” needed two Georgia Senators and his wife to find his own facemask. I’ll sleep better tonight. What could possibly go wrong with Joe at the helm?
In other missing news, apparently police in Seattle, Portland, Minneapolis, St. Louis and Philadelphia are retiring, quitting and getting the hell out of Dodge. Nobody blames them. The men and women in blue courageously protecting those cities with their lives are demoralized, defunded and quitting en masse because all the whiny, pampered, millennials are sick and tired of the po-po getting all up in their biz and actually maintaining law and order. They want to defund the police? Why bother? The police will be gone soon enough. The quality of life in those metropolises will deteriorate and eventually resemble Somalia in the springtime. Then the whiny, entitled snowflakes will flee the cities they contaminated, board a bus and take their circus of horrors on the road to destroy healthy red states.
Joe pondered and pondered the solution to this problem spreading across America. Who could replace the police? Who could he call? Ghostbusters? Batman? Nope. Joe shouted eureka! He decided to call his best buds, the Chinese for help.
The Chinese have a million armed soldiers standing around looking for something to do, invade, steal or all of the above. The Chinese appreciated Joe’s invitation and said that they would be over to help. Joe thanked them profusely for their generosity and offered them unlimited access to any top secret information that would aid them in their mission to protect our cities. Joe insisted on one caveat-they must wear face masks. In a tweet to the press and all of those deplorable Trump supporters, Joe said, “Hey, all you lying, dog faced, pony soldiers, Xi Ping Pong seems awfully nice, and I trust him. This is my brilliant idea, not that stupid Trump who I beat by 80 million votes in 1820.”
(Excerpt) Read more at floppingaces.net ...
...when his face mask went missing. He panicked and called the FBI for assistance. Unfortunately, 12 crack FBI agents were already preoccupied kicking down the door of an innocent couple in Alaska because the armed G-men erroneously thought that the Huepers snatched Pelosi’s laptop during their visit to the Capital on January 6... another 7 FBI agents recently tore up Giuliani’s apartment. They may have received an anonymous tip from someone’s flying monkeys that Rudy was hiding her laptop under his bed. Anyway, back to the case of Joe’s missing surgical mask. Dr. Jill jumped to the rescue and after an exhaustive search, found Joe’s mask hiding in his pocket.
I think their plan is to get all good cops to resign and get defunded so they can replace them with their storm troopers.
How many Americans understand that the left’s call to DEFUND THE POLICE IS NOT to eliminate the police? They want to do away with YOUR LOCAL cops and replace them with a NATIONAL POLICE FORCE CONTROLLED BY AND RESPONSIBLE ONLY TO THE SAME MARXIST DEEP STATE CRIMINALS WHO BRAZENLY STOLE THE 2020 ELECTION AND ONLY GOD KNOWS HOW MANY BEFORE THAT. Yes, local cops are not saints and rotten apples are found in every barrel. That said, what they once were (and some forces still are) is accountable to local city, county and state politicians WE - barring the sort of chicanery we saw in 2020 - elect to those offices. If YOUR local cops become abusive, if those local officials want to remain in office they had better correct those abuses.
As arduous as the process is to clean up problems with LOCAL POLICE, imagine, if you can, how tough it will be if your only recourse is to “write your congressman”. How well has that worked for us over the years?
Stalinist Russia had a national police force. It was called the NKVD and, later, the KGB. The Russian people foolish enough to challenge Stalin wound up dead or cutting trees in Siberia.
Hitler also had a national police force. His was called the GESTAPO! and millions of German people (mainly the Jews and others who opposed Hitler) went to “camp” or the guillotine!
Think about it.
Our problem is less with the police than with their political bosses, the Doug Neidermeiers of the world who have taken us into the dangerous netherworld of a POLICE STATE! Be afraid. BE VERY AFRAID.
Where is the rest of the article?
There is a FReepathon going on!
When you’re not posting clickbait, how about a donation?
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Didn’t I just say exactly that?
Yes, you did.
THAT said, it’s well settled that it takes a minimum of 7 exposures to an idea for it to fully register with another human of average intelligence.
It takes over 2,000 exposures to impact the vestigial tiny limbic brain of a Democrat.
I’m sorry, I made the usual freeper mistake of assuming you were addressing me personally instead of the article.
I see now you are commenting on the contents of the article.
Good thing I didn’t call you an a**hole :)
Yes, thank you! Besides, if one believes an ahole is without value, imagine going through life WITHOUT one.
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