The Oldest Established [A Biden Musical Parody]

Frank Loesser (with help from Political Junkie Too) | April 17, 2021 | Political Junkie Too

[Political Junkie Too]

The Oldest Established

[CHUCK]
The Cuomos want a grand

[NANCY]
But we ain't got a grand on hand

[KAMALA]
And they now got a lock on the door
Of the Governor of Californeeaaah

[CHUCK]
There's the stock room behind the Conway bar

[NANCY]
But Mrs. Fitzpatrick ain't a good scout

[KAMALA]
And things being how they are
The back of the GOP HQ is out

[NANCY/CHUCK]
So the Cuomo machine is the spot

[KAMALA]
But the one thousand bucks we ain't got

[CONGRESS]
Why it's good old reliable Biden!
Biden, Biden, Biden the Prez!
If you're looking for insults, he'll furnish the quote
Even when the heat is on, it's never too woke
Not for good old reliable Biden!
Where it's always just a small fee
To the oldest established, permanent floating
Crap game in DC.

There are well-heeled donors everywhere, everywhere
There are well-heeled donors donors everywhere

[MARK ZUCKERBERG, JACK DORSEY]
And an awful lot of lettuce
For the fella who can get us there

[HUNTER BIDEN]
If I only had a lousy little grand
I could be a millionaire!

[CONGRESS]
Why it's good old reliable Biden!
Biden, Biden, Biden the Prez!
If you're looking for ballots, he'll furnish the vote
Even when the camera's on, it's always cutthroat
For good old reliable Biden!
Where it's always just a short flee
From the oldest established, permanent floating
Crap game in DC

There are well-heeled pollsters everywhere, everywhere
There are well-heeled pollsters everywhere

[NATE SILVER, FRANK LUNTZ]
And an awful lot of lettuce
For the fella who can get us there

[OSSOFF/WARNOCK]
If we only had a lousy little grand
We could be a millionaire!

[CONGRESS]
That's good old reliable Biden!
Biden, Biden, Biden the Prez!
If the size of your turnout you want to increase
He'll arrange that you succeed in quiet and peace

In a courtroom provided by Biden
Where the judges always agree
It's the oldest established permanent floating
Crap game in DC

[CBS-NBC-ABC-CNN-NYT-WAPO]
Where's the action? Where's the game?

[JEN PSAKI]
Gotta have the game
Or circle back from shame

[EVERYONE]
It's the oldest established, permanent floating
Crap game in DC!

[Political Junkie Too]

Some Saturday humor.

Enjoy!

-PJ

[Political Junkie Too]

Sunday night bump.

-PJ