Put yourself in the hands of the Lord who brought you thru this. If you have not done so, give you sins and life to the Lord Jesus who loved you and gave Himself for you, that you may be saved on His account.
If we trust in Him and are walking in faith and a good conscience (not that I always am), we should not fear death, which will happen to all, sooner or later. Which is a better change of address for those who die in the Lord, yet we should want to do more in this life for Him, in gratitude for what he has done.
I have not been in your degree of danger, but though that is not the same as your situation. i have been threatened with, and received bodily violence in witnessing for Christ.
One time many years ago a man put a knife to my throat for standing outside a evil place and warning souls not to go in there but to turn to Christ. He asked me how long I was going to do this, and I said “As long as the Lord would have me to.” He was not angry, but responded, “You do not understand what I mean,” and put a knife to my throat. But I had already put myself in the hands of God, since it was His “idea” for me to be doing this, and I knew that nothing could touch me unless it passed by the throne of God, as it were, and He allowed it.
He then moved the knife down my shirt and cut a button off it, saying, “I love it, you did not even flinch” (yes, the guy was a “little off”) and then invited me to get something to eat at the stand down the street. And I went with him to witness to him (because I sensed my job was done, and was hungry)!
I not claim this compares with what you endured, nor do i often walk in such degree of surrender to the Lord, but know that the Lord is in control, though we need to walk according to His word and be led by His Spirit.
You have my love, my prayers, and my support.