What do you call 4 blondes at a four way stop intersection????????
Eternity....
Why did the blonde have lipstick on her steering wheel????
She kept trying to blow the horn.......
Please remove this thread...
Artificial Intelligence.
Blonde, brunette and redhead are alone on an island...They are trying to figure out how to get off...
The blonde sets out to swim off...
The redhead builds a flimsy raft to try and float off...
The brunette walks across the bridge....
*grins*
OK. I want you to paint the porch. Everything is in the garage. I want you to scrape it, sand the rough spots, fill in any holes, one coat of primer and two coats of paint. Can you handle it? Ill give you $500.
She says, No problem, and she heads to the garage. After 9 hours, covered with sweat and paint, she knocks on the door and says All finished.
you scrapped, sanded, filled in the holes? Yes Primer and 2 coats of paint? Yes Handing over the money, the owner says, Ill check it out. Come back next week, I may have more work for you. The blonde smiled and said, And oh, by the way, its not a Porsche, its a Maserati.
Why are brunettes always so proud of their hair?
Because it always matches their mustache....
Wow that is an old joke, I don’t mean I’ve heard it before... I mean a joke that involves leaving a note on your door step for the milkman goes back a ways!
I once was following a BMW in Alexandria, VA with Kennedy bumper stickers on his bumper and windows. I thought, another liberal, until I got close and read the fine print. “ A blond in every pond. “
As a Blonde in America shouldn’t I yell scream start a social net backlash. I like to laugh so go ahead.
I worked in a DoD office with a blond secretary who knew, and avidly repeated, every single blonde joke that had ever been written. She was constantly regaling us with this knowledge.
One day, as I was discussing an office topic with her, her mother came into the office. The mother, just as blonde and vivacious as her daughter, walks straight up to her daughter, leans in as if to whisper something in her daughters ear, and then blows a puff of air into the daughters ear.
The daughter’s eyes open wide and she says, “Oh, a refill”.
To this day I do not know how I kept from laughing myself sick. I did not know how to react. They giggled like school girls and went on their merry way.
A husband knew his blonde wife had always wanted a champagne bath. For her birthday, he bought 50 bottles of champagne and emptied every bottle into the tub. Leading his wife into the bathroom, he said “Happy Birthday, honey.”, and revealed his surprise. She was ecstatic. She quickly disrobbed and lowered herself into the champagne bath, giggling at the tickle of the bubbles. The husband left her to her birthday pleasure.
Two hours later the wife called to her husband and told him she was finished. She climbed out of the tub, dried off and dressed.
After she left, the husband eyed the bathtub still full of champagne and thought...”Darn shame to waste all of that champagne.”. He went to the kitchen, grabbed a cup and a funnel, returned to the bath and began scooping out the champagne and refilling the bottles. Finally, he was almost done...filling and corking the last bottle. He then realized there was a little more champagne at the bottom of the tub. He scooped up the remaining 3/4 cup and said to himself....”Nah, she wouldn’t have...”.
(Yes, I know...tremendously ancient.)
A blonde walks in to a library and up to the librarian’s counter. She loudly says, “I’d like a Coke, a burger and some fries.” Confused, the librarians says to her, “Honey, you do realize this is a library, don’t you?” Shocked, the blonde looks around and then whispers back, “Sorry, I’d like a Coke, a burger and some fries.”