Administration "Not Disappointed" with Job Numbers [semi-satire]

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 5 June 2016 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

Though the Bureau of Labor Statistics report for May showed an anemic 38,000 new jobs were created during the month and a record 94,708,000 Americans were not in the labor force, Obama Administration Press Secretary Josh Earnest insisted that "we are not disappointed with these numbers."

"Those who can't grasp the President's goals for the transformation of this country harp on the point that 38,000 new jobs are far too few to accommodate this country's monthly 200,000 population increase," Earnest complained. "Likewise, they see the expansion of the contingent not in the workforce as a negative. They've got it exactly backwards. The President sees these figures as proof of progress."

"Work is a disutility," Earnest explained. "People only do it because they have to. If they could get everything they want without having to work that would be ideal. Well, the President's program has made this possible for more people than ever before in our history. A better way of looking at the numbers is to see that fewer than 20% of the additional 200,000 persons in the population will be forced to take jobs. More than 80% are spared this fate. Nearly 95 million Americans are now freed from the rat race. The President is proud of this achievement."

"Proud as the President may be, he realizes there is still much work to be done," Earnest added. "Sadly, more than 62% of the adult population are still employed. This is an improvement over the nearly 66% in this predicament at the start of the President's first term. But the gains have been painfully slow and could easily be reversed if current policies aren't continued in the next administration, as seems likely if the GOP retakes the White House."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,210189.0.html

[butlerweave]

Obama’s Laser is burn out from all the focusing

[kaehurowing]

The administration said the fact that more and more people are being freed from their jobs to find more creative alternatives in their lives should be celebrated.

[Sam Gamgee]

Oh, this is satire, still not totally beyond belief...