Skip to comments.The MOTUS/Molsterman 2016 Primary Tracking Poll #1
Posted on 04/20/2015 8:50:02 AM PDT by NOBO2012
Now that the Campaign for the Big White is officially out of the gate, its time for a primary poll, so I called in my trusted pollster - the most connected mole in Washington and creator of:
to assist me in this ongoing task. We discuss, below, the parameters and significance of the polls.
MOTUS: Hi Molsterman, thanks for stopping by.
Molsterman: No problem, I was in the neighborhood for dinner anyway, best grubs in town around here. Whats on your mind?
MOTUS: Well, I was wondering if it would be a good time to start our primary tracking polls. I know theres only Hilz in the Demo
Molsterman: Stop right there. Its always a good time for a poll no matter whos in the hunt and whos sitting on their thumbs.
MOTUS: Ok, good. So how do you see things shaping up?
Molsterman: Look, if this is about how I see things shaping up, you dont need a poll. Butt if youre paying for a poll you should get what you pay for: so what are you looking for?
MOTUS: Sorry, I mean who would you put in our polls?
Molsterman: Who do you want to win?
MOTUS: What? No, I mean I want a poll where people can vote for who they want to win
Molsterman: Well, thats not really how it works butt we can do it your way if you want. Sorry I snapped at you, I havent had dinner yet and my blood sugars a little low. Got any grubs around here?
MOTUS: Any grubs around here - thats a joke, right? Ill fix us a snack.
Molsterman: Good, but none of that crap that Lady M makes school kids eat! If I wanted a canned sardine with a hockey puck and a side order of cracked wheat I could have stopped in at a school on my way over.
MOTUS: I thought youd love Lady Ms healthy school lunches!
Molsterman: Ill stick with assorted bugs and worms, thanks. Much more appealing, if you just give them proper lighting and presentation.
A proper plate of cicadas, with correct lighting.
Molsterman: Right... Ok look, heres whats on the 2016 table as of today. On the GOP side weve got three of our best Senators: Ted Cruz, Rand Paul and Marco Rubio. If it was up to me, Id close the nominations right now. Ok, Id let Walker in, butt he should get off his thumbs and announce. Come on Scott, the waters fine, jump in. Besides, if were announcing alphabetically, its your turn.
On the Demoncratic side, well, weve got Yesterday.
MOTUS: So I guess theres no reason to run a poll with only one candidate is there?
Molsterman: Use your CPU girly: were the pollsters now, theres always a reason to run a poll. Its Yesterday or Anybody Else or if you prefer, ABC Anybody Butt Clinton.
MOTUS: Oh, yeah. Thats brilliant.
Molsterman: Quit sucking up. Where are those snacks?
MOTUS: It takes a little longer when you want to get the lighting and presentation right, butt here you go; fried grubs on sticks.
Molsterman: Youre a doll; have you got any ranch dressing around here?
MOTUS: Umm, the presidential polls?
Molsterman: Right, so heres your GOP poll:
Molsterman: and heres your Demoncratic poll:
Molsterman: Chicago Rules apply as accuracy is secondary to what were really tracking - preferences and enthusiasm so as always early and frequent voting is encouraged. These are open primaries, anybody can cast multiple votes in one or both polls. No proof of citizenship or photo ID required, just like in the real election on November 8, 2016
MOTUS: Thanks Molsterman.
Molsterman: Youre welcome MOTUS.
MOTUS: I dont think youve ever called me MOTUS before!
Molsterman:Thats okay Toots, I like to keep things professional as a rule butt since it looks like well be working so closely for the next year and a half I think we can operate on a first name basis.
MOTUS: Butt I dont know your first name
Molsterman: Thats for your own good. You know how to get a hold of me, call when you want the inside dirt on Hilz foreign contributions for foreign aid scam. The NYT has barely scratched the surface. We may well be approaching that infamous spot where the worm turns.
Watch as Hilz stumbles from dead broke to not well off to okay, not richy-rich.
MOTUS: Thanks for your assistance Molsterman, Ill be getting back to you as the campaign progresses for more of your polling and dirt digging expertise.
Molsterman: You wont regret it, Toots.
Note: As always, H/T and apologies to Ulsterman.
Posted from: Michelle Obamas Mirror
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