Posted on 02/09/2014 12:51:28 PM PST by usalady
A number of years ago I saw a comedy skit called “Defending The Caveman”.
One of the funniest, and true, bits I have ever seen.
As a man, I’m surprised the book about what men understand about women is even that thick.
| Free Republic 1st Quarter Fundraising Target: $85,000 | Receipts & Pledges to-date: $39,722 | |||
|
||||
| Woo hoo!! And the first 46% is in!! Thank you all very much!! | ||||
Based on that information women should stay at home.
The commie lib PROGS are slowly finding out that THERE IS a difference between men and women! Well goooOOOOooolly! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Yet another “unexpected” moment in the History of Commie PROG liberalism.
I think we all know that book is only a couple pages thick .. LOL
Lord help me, I've been living with women since the first day I drew breath, but I have yet to completely understand them.
Re: #10
Some of us are more turned on by the cleavage in the rear...
i do understand them. they are illogical. they hold double-standards but think they don’t. they want equal treatment until they don’t, when it’s not beneficial for them. if anyone is wrong, it’s never them. the closer the relationship they have with you, the less they value your opinion/advice. they keep your shortcomings in a mental holster ready to whip out if you wind up saying something that rubs them the wrong way. you will eventually say something that rubs them the wrong way and you won’t know it until they conversationally ambush you. you can’t be unguardedly honest and relaxed talking to them or you will eventually say something they don’t like.
His & Her Diary From the Same Day
Below is the result of a writing assignment given by an English professor from the University of Colorado. A “tandem story” was to be written by two students, one male, one female.
The story was to be compiled in alternating paragraphs via email, with CC’s to the professor. There was to be no communication between the writers aside from each successive email. The story would end when both participants agreed a successful conclusion had been achieved.
THE STORY:
(first paragraph by Rebecca)
At first, Laurie couldn’t decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the question.
(second paragraph by Gerry)
Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic, tea-drenched bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. “A.S. Harris to GeoStation 17,” he said into his transgalactic communicator. “Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far...” But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship’s cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the cockpit.
(Rebecca)
He died almost immediately. But not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who ever had feelings for him. Soon afterward, Earth stopped pointless hostilities toward the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4. “Congress Passes Law Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel,” Laurie read online one morning. The news simultaneously excited and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and carefree, with no cell phones, no Internet to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at the beauty around her. “Why must one lose one’s innocence to become a woman?” she pondered wistfully.
(Gerry)
Little did she know she had less than 10 seconds to live. The wimpy peaceniks who’d pushed the Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament Treaty through Congress had left Earth a defenseless target for hostile empires determined to destroy the human race. Just hours after the passage of the treaty, alien ships were on course for Earth with enough firepower to pulverize the entire planet. Their lithium fusion missiles entered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, was rocked by the inconceivably massive explosion which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie.
(Rebecca)
This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic, semi-literate adolescent geek.
(Gerry)
Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. “Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other F..... TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I’m an air headed bimbo who reads too many romance novels!”
(Rebecca)
A...hole.
(Gerry)
Bitch!
(Rebecca)
.... YOU - YOU NEANDERTHAL!!
(Gerry)
In your dreams, ‘Ho. Go drink some more ..... tea.
(Rebecca)
I hate you. Don’t ever talk to me again.
(TEACHER)
A+ I really liked this one.
Damn, bro. I was only kinda halfway joking.
When you get into a relationship with a woman who really fits you, you’ll find plenty of room to make light of the differences between men and women’s thinking.
It really ain’t all that serious.
next thing you know they will study liberals and find out their brains stop maturing at age 12..and start regressing
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.
