,,,Wait for it..
Posted on 01/25/2013 2:40:21 PM PST by virgil283
"(Elderly couple, Mr A and Mrs B are staring through french windows at a cat that is sitting in the middle of their lawn motionless and facing away from them. A car is heard drawing up.)
Mr A: Oh good, that'll be the Vet, dear.
Mrs B: I'd better go and let him in.
(Mrs B goes out and comes back into the room with the Vet)
Mrs B: (stage whisper) It's the Vet, dear.
Mr A: Oh very glad indeed you could come round, sir.
Vet: Not at all. Now what seems to be the problem? You can tell me - I'm a Vet, you know.
Mrs B: See! Tell him, dear.
Mr A: Well...
Mrs B: It's our cat. He doesn't do anything. He just sits out there on the lawn.
Vet: Is he ... dead?
Mr A: Oh, no!
Vet: (to camera dramaticaly) Thank God for that. For one ghastly moment I thought I was... too late. If only more people would call in the nick of time.
Mrs B: He just sits there, all day and every day.
Mr A: And at night.
Mrs B: Sh! Almost motionless. We have to take his food out to him.
Mr A: And his milk.
Mrs B: Sh! He doesn't do anything. He just sits there.
Vet: Are you at your wits' end?
Mrs B: Definitely, yes.
Vet: Hm. I see. Well I think I may be able to help you. You see ... (he goes over to armchair, puts on spectacles, sits, crosses legs and puts finger tips together)... your cat is suffering from what we Vets haven't found a word for. His condition is typified by total physical inertia, absence of interest in its ambience - what we Vets call environment - failure to respond to the conventional external stimuli - a ball of string, a nice juicy mouse, a bird. To be blunt, your cat is in a rut. It's the old stockbroker syndrome, the suburban fin de siecle ennui, angst, weltschmertz, call it what you will. "
,,,Wait for it..
Other than the Twit Olympics, my favorite Python skit of all time.
Don’t forget “Interesting People,” with Michael Palin at his cheesiest:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=23C9xMRCOPY
Here’s the video.
One of my favorites, along with dead parrot and I’m a lumberjack
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B2Je1CEPkUM
This would be a good thread to discuss our favorite Python skits:
1. The Argument Sketch
2. Defense against Fresh Fruit (...and pointed sticks....SHUT UP!)
3. Crunchy Frog
4. The Restaurant Sketch (The Dirty Fork)
5. Silly Job Interview (FIVE....FOUR...THREE...TWO.....ONE...ZERO!)
6. The Undertaker Sketch (Cannibalism)
7. The Piranha Brothers (Dinsdale!)
8. The Cheese Shop/Salad Days (I say, anyone for Tennis?)
9. The Bicycle Tour (How could you miss?)
10. Election Night Special (Heck, right now the “Silly Party” looks good).
Kitteh ping!
“Never kill a customer.”
Don’t forget the Spanish Inquisition.
Interesting People
Joke Warfare
Mr. Hilter\North Minehead By-Election
Honorable Mention, should go to the Hungarian Phrase Book, “Drop your panties, Sir William; I cannot wait until lunchtime!”
Hitler Ah yes, ve make a little hike for, for Bideford.
Johnson (leaning over map) Oh well, you’ll want the A39 then...no, no, you’ve got the wrong map there, this is Stalingrad, you want the Ilfracombe and Barnstaple section.
Hitler Ah! Hein...Reginald you have the wrong map here you silly old leg-before-wicket English person.
Himmler I’m sorry mein Fuhrer. I did not...(Hitler slaps him) Mein Dickie old chum.
Landlady Lucky Mr Johnson pointed that out, eh? You wouldn’t have had much fun in Stalingrad, would you...(they don’t see the joke) I said, you wouldn’t have had much fun in Stalingrad, would you, ha, ha, ha?
Hitler (through clenched teeth) Not much fun in Stalingrad, no.
Nudge Nudge Wink Wink
The Art of Not Being Seen
Bicycle Repairman
Encyclopedia Salesman
Twin Peaks of Kilimanjaro
Philosophers Soccer Match
I saw an article the other day where a fellow was growing a new nose on his arm and I immediately thought of “Interesting People” LOL
Funny stuff...ssshhh.
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