Egypt Seals Gaza Border Using Secret Weapon: Yoko Ono!

Fit-To-Print N ews ^

[Ge0ffrey]

RAFAH, Egypt — Electric batons could not stop hordes of Palestinians from illegally pouring through a hole in the border fence between Gaza and Egypt. Nor could water canons, and bulldozers.

Palestinians have repeatedly crossed into Egypt for supplies since last Wednesday. As soon as Egyptian forces have sealed up one hole, Hamas forces have succeeded in blasting a new one somewhere else in the 18-foot fence that divides this backwater border town in two.

Nothing Egyptian officials did seemed to work until they began blasting Yoko Ono music from the same speakers normally used to call Muslims to prayer. This began on Friday, immediately after Maghrib (or sunset) prayer.

“This is why no one dare stopping music,” said Egyptian General Abdel Hamid, who said he got the idea from watching APOCALYPSE NOW, his favorite American movie.

[Oberon]

Isn’t that a violation of the Geneva convention or something? Seems to me it’s a crime against humanity. Eww.

[Lonesome in Massachussets]

“I play Yoko, it scares the shiite outta the Pals.”

There must be something about this in the Geneva Convention.

“I love the smell of camel in the morning. It smells like - Palestine!”

[Lonesome in Massachussets]

gmta

[Dr. Sivana]

The flipside of Lennon’s Starting Over was Ono’s Kiss Kiss Kiss. I used it to get stragglers to leave Pizza Hut at closing time. It was wrong.

[D Rider]

Must be the second side of the Plastic Ono Band, live in Toronto. Pretty awful stuff.

[rawcatslyentist]

SLim Whitman for Martians.

Yoko Ono for mooseSlimes.

[servo1969]

It would definitely work on me.

[fella]

We should try this on our Southren border in Kalifornia. If it fails we haven’t lost much.

[Oldpuppymax]

Joko played at full blast might have caused the 101st Airborne to surrender at Bastogne! It’s just inhuman!

[Oldpuppymax]

Joko played at full blast might have caused the 101st Airborne to surrender at Bastogne! It’s just inhuman!

[SunkenCiv]

Thanks Ge0ffrey.

Electric batons could not stop hordes of Palestinians from illegally pouring through a hole in the border fence between Gaza and Egypt. Nor could water canons, and bulldozers... they began blasting Yoko Ono music from the same speakers normally used to call Muslims to prayer. This began on Friday, immediately after Maghrib (or sunset) prayer.

[aposiopetic]

Out of curiosity, was this before, during or after your time in Hyde Park?

[Dr. Sivana]

Out of curiosity, was this before, during or after your time in Hyde Park? Before. I went to college fall of '82. Lennon was shot in December, 1980, so the just released "Starting Over" was hitting jukeboxes around that time. The manager at that time also persuaded the jukebox guy to load eight Barry Manilow 45s. While Yoko Ono was a nuclear bomb good for all ages, youngsters were easily gotten out by extended conventional warfare--a seemingly unending barrage of Barry Manilow songs (9 for $1). "B" sides could cause increased consternation and discomfort, as the recipients usually didn't know where it was going (except for the unavoidable key change) or when it would end. We never tried simply replaying the same BM song over and over again, as that might affect us as well. Some of us had suffered exposure of repeat plays of Queen's "Another One Bites the Dust" on a busy Friday night, at the hands of a series of malevolent customers wielding quarters. The effects are with me to this day.