Not sure if you’ve ever relocated before, my first experience was about a year ago (and about 1,400 miles).
I’ll assume you and your wife are all-in. If not, have a long conversation to make absolutely certain you are. If you’re not, don’t do it. Here’s what I’d offer:
1. If you’re being offered a relocation package see if it covers your realtor fee to sell your house, covers your moving expenses including 2 cars, temporary housing, temporary storage, and a short term rental car. Get at least 1 multi-day visit to the area (paid for by the company) to sort out where you’re going to live. Ask for these things.
2. Assume your moving company will fail to meet your timeline. Long distance moves, especially at certian times of the year, will not go as expected. Plan ahead by moving a couple weeks worth of clothese with you. If you have kids, bring toys.
3. Would not suggest buying a house immediately. Sure, it sucks to move twice. It sucks more if you buy a house only to find that it isn’t the right neighborhood for you. Once you move you’ll develop better perceptions on the right place to live. Do recommend renting a house if you’re used to a lot of space and/or don’t want to pay for storage of all your crap. Oh yeah, use a Realtor to help find a rental - they will get you in to see properties faster and may guide you on neighborhoods, etc.
4. If your wife doesn’t work (stays home with the kids) understand that it could be tough on her. She will not have the benefit of going to work each day, meeting new people, adult conversation, etc. If she’s not an outgoing person, help her get involved in things. Even a part time job is a good idea.
6. Become a part of the community - find a church, help out at school, join cub scouts, introduce yourself to neighbors, etc.
7. Set expectations with the family - moving is tough, going to a new school can mean having to make a lot of new friends, etc. It absolutely does get better and if you do it right can be one hell of an adventure.
Good luck!
The wife and I are going to take an trip down there to see if it is the right move. We have moved in the past, so we know some of the ins and outs, but your advice is appreciated, since it has been awhile since our last move.