Report: Marines Banned from Farting in Afghanistan

The Blaze ^ | 26 Aug 2011 | Buck Sexton

[mandaladon]

Marines in Afghanistan have reportedly been told not to pass gas around Afghans to avoid offending the indigenous population. That’s right, now any leatherneck who lets one rip on patrol with Afghans nearby could receive a a talk from his superior officer.

The new flatulence restriction was first picked up by the Military Times, and has since become fodder for online discussion ranging from the curious to the ridiculous.

A few military bloggers have taken it seriously and found the ban to be indicative of a trend among military brass of bending over backwards to avoid offending the locals.

Others have pointed out that a culture that has allowed stoning, various forms of execution, and amputations as penalties for criminal offenses should be able to withstand a little passed gas.

The new regulation is not covered in the Uniform Code of Military Justice, and the military has not even confirmed it exists.

For now, the “fart ban” appears to be simply a guideline for good manners while Marines are out on patrol.

We’ll let you know if the Blaze catches wind of any developments.

[mandaladon]

I just don't know what to say !!!

[Bruce Campbells Chin]

Without blue flame contests, deployment would be unbearable.

[gunnyg]

F@rt Proudly and continue to march!

[RickB444]

How else are they going to communicate with the muslims?

[NonValueAdded]

I just don't know what to say !!!

That's easy! Say کشیدن انگشت من

[Paladin2]

They need to issue afterburners and quit making bean burrito MREs.

[penelopesire]

What about things they do that offend our troops?

[mmichaels1970]

Side benefit is that they are helping prevent global warming.

[NonValueAdded]

hint: that’s in Dari

[Sir Napsalot]

Why just the Marines?
/

[TexasFreeper2009]

backdoor method of attacking homo’s in the military?

I like it!

lol

[Sir Napsalot]

So, I guess, pumping your armpit to imitate the sound is also banned?

[MNDude]

I heard that Oprah’s bodyguards complain that when they went jogging with her, she would always release silent and stinky ones.

[mardi59]

I guess they don’t want anything to interfere with their enjoyment of a good camel fart.

[Da Coyote]

So, by farting, we offend folks who’s religion demands they wipe their Obamahole with their left hand?

[aruanan]

For now, the “fart ban” appears to be simply a guideline for good manners while Marines are out on patrol.

So the Pentagon has issued a fartwah?

And our Marines, so as to not give cultural offense, should not fart audibly in front of those Afghani soldiers who think it culturally acceptable to have pre-pubescent boyfriends?

[Jack Hydrazine]

Is it possible to get court marshaled for doing that intentionally against orders?

[redgolum]

I do.

We need to leave. Now. If the brass is worried about a Marine upsetting an enemy by farting, there is no longer any reason to risk more blood and treasure in what has become a farce.

[colorado tanker]

Don't they realize farts can be an effective close combat weapon?

[b4its2late]