World Cup Fever!!! Avoid It Like Avian Flu!

The Voice of Reason ^ | June 13, 2010 | Texas Peartree

[Texas Peartree]

The fevered pitch of excitement is hard to describe! Americans are jubilant at the 1-1 tie their team picked up against the British (we still are furious about their colonialism and cuisine)! On my block alone there have been two, make that three soccer riots.

I myself have pushed a brick wall over onto a crowd a singing Argentina soccer fans . . . twice. Well, same crowd but different brick walls. Wait, why were they singing the lyrics from Evita?

No, the fact is that nobody in America gives a tinker's damn about soccer, or at least no American in America does. Nor should they. When I was growing up it was all about the big three: football, baseball and basketball. Actually, here is Texas it was pretty much about the big one: football. Baseball and basketball were simply a way to stay in shape during the football off-season.

I notice that in whatever ethnic restaurants I go to (Chinese, Middle Eastern, Latin American) there is a flat-screen TV showing a thrilling 0-0 game. All of the waitstaff have their eyes glued to the "beautiful game". What am I missing? the game is deadly boring with virtually no scoring. It is like National League baseball in the 1980s.

There is, it must be said, something deeply un-American about a game that we Americans cannot regularly dominate. This must stop. If we do not win the World Cup this year, we must all agree to drop soccer as a sport. Agreed?...

[antiRepublicrat]

At least I did not see any of those horrible soccer injuries where the player writhes on the ground for eternity.

You should have stayed to watch our goalie get a cleated shoe to the chest. He eventually got back up though. I was thinking bruised rib at least. Amazing that not too much later someone kicked the ball very hard at the goal and our goalie caught it in his chest about ten feet away -- and held it.

Howard is one tough dude.