Posted on 08/10/2009 11:38:49 AM PDT by jurroppi1
Please help me out! My daughter grew a massive sunflower from seed in a wildflower garden that we planted late this spring. This flower was MAGNIFICENT, it had eight blooms and 3 or 4 more on the way! Neighbor boys cut it down with a tent pole this morning and Bachman's has told us that it will likely die.
We are in MN (twin cities area), so I'm trying to find somewhere, anywhere, that has sunflowers (mature ones preferably). Bachman's told us no dice - they don't have any.
My 2.5 year old is going to be crushed, and Mom and I are having a hard time trying to figure out how we will explain this to her. This is a brutal lesson for her to learn at 2.5 years old. She has been nurturing these flowers from seed - watering them herself, checking on them everyday, waiting for new blooms, etc...
My initial thought too, and the Mother of the child and his friend seems to be genuinely willing to help (asked how she could fix the problem and swore she would do so somehow).
We shall see how that plays out.
I’m still working on that angle - thanks for the info!
Pin the thing together, tell your kid it’s time to harvest it. Make a big deal about cutting it down, help her give it a snip and there ya go.
Reminds me of when I was 6 years old or so. Except my destruction of the neighbor’s flowers wasn’t to be mean. It was so I could bring a beautiful bouqet (sp?) to my mommy!
The toughest thing to explain to any kid at any age is what bastards some people can be.
You could wait a couple of weeks until the weather has cooled down, buy a bag of winter rye, go out at night and use the seed to spell something like Billy and Mike are stupid and have kooties in their yards and along area greenways.
Dry the seeds and help her build a bird house to put them in. This way she gets to see her work pay off with all of the pretty birds that just love her seeds. As for the neighbor kids, plant them head first until their feet are at least three feet under, water weekly, and then plant next year’s watermelon patch over them. You will get some really choice melons this way. (or so I’ve been told!)
I understand that the destruction of the plant was sudden and unexpected, but your fear that your daughter will be devastated makes me suspect you haven’t really talked to her about the fragile, temporary nature of plants. Did you tell her when you started this project that the plant was going to die at the end of the summer? If so, then she already understands, and all you’re dealing with is the unexpected timing. Painful, but not devastating. If you didn’t tell her that no matter how hard she worked the plant would die at the end of the summer, then you may have unintentionally set her up for heart ache. This event just moved the time table up a few weeks.
Ah Sunflower, weary of time,
Who countest the steps of the sun;
Seeking after that sweet golden clime
Where the traveller’s journey is done;
Where the Youth pined away with desire,
And the pale virgin shrouded in snow,
Arise from their graves, and aspire
Where my Sunflower wishes to go!
I just spoke with a very nice lady at Linder’s. Unfortunately it’s too late in the season for the seeds to germinate and take, plus the seeds may not be “ripe”. She told me what to look for in the seeds to know if they will be viable at all, but said they don’t transplant well so that may not be a good option either.
Short of finding one and transplanting it though, I fear I have no other options - it can’t be grafted since it was totally broken off.
Not to be crude but, this could be a teachable moment.
Flowers will grow again next year and boys are....(fill in the blank)
Thank you for the info!
I’ll work on getting there with her on this... My fear is that she won’t comprehend the lesson and just be angry with me for going there.
I can deal with the hurt and that type of pain no problem, but I don’t know how she will react. I’ve been thinking about all the ways I can get her through this and past it while providing such a lesson.
I’m hoping she will surprise me with how she reacts, but I don’t know how likely that is or if its foolhardy for me to hold out that hope, but I will anyhow.
Yes, at 2.5 she is ready to be the next president of the US also. Can’t be any worse than what we’ve got now...
Sheesh!
Sorry, but the people on this thread saying similar things are probably either childless or emotionless.
This is one BIG thing to her since she planted and nurtured the thing from seed and she is 2.5 years old. I assume you were perpetually disappointed as a child and it brought you to this conclusion?!!
Fortunately I can ignore any further response from you along with throwing this one down the memory hole after I’ve hit the post button. Unfortunately for my daughter this will probably cause some hurt emotions. I know I’d be confused at her age about this - hell I am as an adult! (what is it about a fence that says “hey come in and savage my flower garden”?)
The kid’s have been dealt with by their Mom.
I’ll work on getting there with her on this... My fear is that she won’t comprehend the lesson and just be angry with me for going there.I may be completely off base, but it might be a good idea to have a completely hands off approach and let her dictate how to deal with the situation. If she's devastated, talk to her about and let her deal with the grieving process on her own terms.I can deal with the hurt and that type of pain no problem, but I don’t know how she will react. I’ve been thinking about all the ways I can get her through this and past it while providing such a lesson.
I’m hoping she will surprise me with how she reacts, but I don’t know how likely that is or if its foolhardy for me to hold out that hope, but I will anyhow.
It's natural to want to protect our children, but things like this, which while terrible in their own right, prepare our children for the trials and traumas that come with adulthood.
I can ask for help wherever I chose to - what are you a stalinist? What a ridiculous response! I happen to know next to nothing or less about flowers or what remedies might be available, so I requested help.
What is so wrong about asking others for help or information when you have no knowledge about the topic at hand. I suppose you can do everything though, so I’ve probably chosen the wrong person to retort.
If you asked me that to my face, you might have liked the response given even less. Although you’d probably never say that to my face if you knew what I looked like (here’s a clue - I’m not real small).
Go away egomaniac!
very helpful, thanks...
Thanks, this is helping!
Thanks, I’m still getting through the replies, but posts like yours are helping me get a grasp on how to explain this to her.
It baffles me that others on this thread have chosen to bash me personally for asking advice on how to deal with this. I was pretty distraught about how to explain this to her when I first posted and was looking for this type of advice and also advice on how I may be able to repair the flower.
Everybody that is bashing me seems to forget that I have a wife that is probably as devastated - possibly more so than my daughter will be.
I do appreciate the response!
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