Accused Palin Hacker Is Misunderstood

Elective Decisions ^ | 10/9/08 | Chris Davis

[writer33]

Knoxville, TN—In what could land David Kernell in prison for up to five years, the hacking of Sarah Palin’s email account is, like David Kernell, completely misunderstood.

On Wednesday, Kernell was charged with one felony count of accessing a protected computer for allegedly breaking into the private Yahoo e-mail account of Sarah Palin, R-AK, cooking up his own original recipe. Kernell has plead not guilty to the charge, and noted that he will have his day in court.

“My time will come to give my side of the story,” stated Kernell, a 20-year old University of Tennessee student. “I believe I am a patriot, and that will all come out in court.”

Critics of the indictment say that the actions were necessary to help elect Sen. Barack Obama, D-IL, as President of the United States, and that “hacking into Sarah Palin’s e-mail account is as patriotic as paying taxes.”

“I think this is an outrage,” fired Tennessee Representative Mike Kernell. “My son is innocent of a malicious act. He is defending his country from extremists like Palin!”

Even Kernell’s former middle school teacher, Tracy McDaniels told Elective Decisions that Kernell was a bright kid, but was often misunderstood, despite a similar incident occurring back in 2000 during his seventh grade year at Eastern Hills Middle School in Harker Heights, Texas.

“This happened one time before,” quipped McDaniels. “He hacked into the computer at school, printed off the answers to an exam and then used them to cheat. We didn’t think it was that major of an infraction. The principal wanted to make a big deal of it, but we just gave him detention. You don’t want to give smart kids like that a complex.”

“This kind of behavior shouldn’t be tolerated,” claimed Rep. Nancy Pelosi, D-CA. “Unless, of course, it concerns Governor Sarah Palin, then it is entirely appropriate. My thoughts and prayers are with the young man. He has a great future in the Democratic Party.”

As the Democratic Party has attempted to destroy the housing market, the war in Iraq, and any chance at becoming energy independent, David Kernell is only another reminder of why there should always be conservatism.

[writer33]

When the kid grows up he puts it all together and realizes that he can do anything he wants to suppress the “evil” gun-loving, racist conservatives as long as he does not get hurt or caught.

Amen. Thanks for reading, TaxRelief. I appreciate it.

[writer33]

Actually, posters on the Knox News and Nashville Tennessean websites have posted the same things in real life.

Not surprising. Thanks for reading, sticker. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

This is a "Ratheresque" quote; fake but accurate.

True, but thanks for reading. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

Lock him up.

Agreed. Thanks for reading, Bulldawg Fan. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

Thanks for the bump, E.G.C.

[writer33]

cute girl...

Funny, johnny 7. Thanks for reading. I appreciate it.

[writer33]

You sure??

I'm sure. :-)

[writer33]

Put him in cell with Bubba ... Bubba like.

Too funny. Thanks for the comment and for reading, webschooner. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

Thanks for reading, fso301. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

Thanks for reading, Brown Deer. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

Thanks for reading, Highly Opinionated. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

Thanks for reading, Brasil. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

Of course, that would get them fired, but leftists rarely think about the consequences of their actions.

Indeed. Thanks for reading, MarkL. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

Thanks for reading, cricket. Glad you enjoyed it. I do appreciate it.

And he probably will escape ‘time.’

[writer33]

Thanks for reading, Hoodat. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

Thanks for reading, ST. I do appreciate it. Glad you enjoyed it.

[SouthTexas]

;)

[TaxRelief]

Haha, I did catch the satire, but I couldn’t resist the somewhat hyperbolic response..

[writer33]

Glad you enjoyed it and commented.