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DUmmie FUnnies 08-17-08 (DUmmies And KOmmies Disappointed In Obama Saddleback Performance)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | August 17, 2008 | DUmmies, KOmmies, and PJ-Comix

Posted on 08/17/2008 8:36:13 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

So just how bad was Barack Obama's performance in comparison with that of John McCain at last night's Faith Based Forum at Rick Warren's Saddleback church? So bad that even the DUmmies and KOmmies were disappointed in The One. Yes, they have expressed outright disappointment in the Obamassiah in their more honest moments as well as trying to desperately cover for him with lame excuses. Just the very thread titles in DUmmieland and KOmmieland tells you how let down there were by Obama such as this DUmmie THREAD titled, "I won't win cool points for this, but McCain is doing excellent so far, better than Obama," and this reality-denying KOmmie THREAD titled, "Why McCain's 'win' wasn't really a win at the FBF." So let us now watch the DUmmies and KOmmies have their faith shaken in the infallibility of their Obamassiah in Bolshvek Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, remembering Gertrude Stein's famous line about "there is no there there," is in the [barackets]:

I won't win cool points for this, but McCain is doing excellent so far, better than Obama.

[Kewpie Doll! Kewpie Doll! There is a great big Kewpie Doll heading towards your doorstep for have a brief moment of mental clarity.]

The actual answers to questions in these debates don't matter one bit as to who won them, only "moments" do. I honestly can't remember hardly any of Senator Obama's answers to the questions that were asked, while McCain has had at least SOME memorable answers.

[I remember that Obama comment about "being above my pay grade."]

I think it was a mistake for Senator Obama to do this forum.

[And a lot of Democrats are starting to think that it will be a mistake for Senator Obama to be nominated for President. Now on to the other DUmmie disappointments...]

His Vietnam stories and owning up to his marital failure was excellent He's been succinct in his answers. As dumb as his answers have been, he's been pretty straightforward.

[So um, uh...that is, um, well what did you think of, ah, Obama's non-answers?]

I'm rolling my eyes at his Vietnam stories.

[Did you know that John Kerry served in Vietnam?]

Sounds like someone was given the questions in advance.

[A perfect Rovian plot.]

I've been shocked at how well McCain has done compared to what I was expecting. That very well could be it.

[Will Buyer's Remorse raise its ugly head at the Democrat convention?]

Agree that it's a mistake. Giant f*cking fundie echo chamber.

[Allowing Obama to speak sans teleprompter is always a mistake.]

Low info voters love this christian war hero bullshit.. I'm scared for Obama in the general.

[So much for all the previous slam dunk gloating in DUmmieland.]

Giuliani: 911! 911! 911! McCain: Vietnam! Vietnam! Vietnam!

[Obama: Uh! Uh! Uh!]

This stuff sells to Middle America. If my parents were still alive they would love it.

[And vote for McCain.]

F*ck you! You're right. He's doing better than Obama because he is pandering to American ego.

[Check out eBay. I hear they have some good deals on Guy Fawkes costumes.]

who in the hell authorised this in the Obama camp?

[Mark Penn?]

These McCain anecdotes are better than Obama's thoughtful answers. Thankfully all undecided voters are watching the Olympics right now.

[And, of course, they will never ever watch the Saddleback forum later on YouTube. Hee! Hee!]

I do, however, think he was fed these questions in advance.

[See above about the Perfect Rovian Plot.]

It was a mistake for him to think Rick Warren was a FRIEND and would treat him fairly. Warren is TOTALLY kissing Bomb Bomb's ass -- letting him have the chance to "tell stories" and give his stump speech, while he specifically warned Obama he didn't want a stump speech ...

[Also "Bomb Bomb" was listening to the forum from his "cone of silence" with a glass up against the door and his ear on the other end. Hee! Hee!]

I'm REALLY, REALLY disappointed in Warren, because I thought (like Obama did) that he WOULD be an honest broker and he's totally shown his hand.

[See graphic above: Talk to the Hand!]

f*ck the religious right.

[You're going to be FUn to watch as you wear your pizza-stained Guy Fawkes costume on Election Night.]

Well, given the fact that he just asked about the justices question before the guy had even GOTTEN TO THAT QUESTION, you can clearly see why he's doing ok (for McCain). He knew the questions. He's rehearsed. He rattles off stuff because he knew what the questions were.

[All because of that glass against the door from his "cone of silence." Hee! Hee!]

Even though McCain was fed the questions beforehand- he's doing great. Anyone who doesn't think so doesn't know how to analyze performances objectively. He's being forceful and direct- looks in control, and people in the rust belt and places like Virginia are just going to eat this stuf up. Good thing not many people are watching....

[And that they can never ever see it on YouTube.]

As a 'professional' person of faith, McCain's answers appall me

[You're a professional Wiccan witch?]

I don't know why Obama went there - he comes across as a poor second to our "McZero the hero".

[Obama's act Bombed Bombed.]

I’m sorry, but I have no faith in a country that elected Shrub TWO FRAKKIN’ TIMES. McPOW gave all of the answers that the LIV in fly over country love. My only hope is that some women’s eyes were opened tonight and see that McPOW doesn’t have our best interests in mind.

[Obama got McPOWed in the kisser last night.]

McCain's responses don't make sense. In fact, some of them are lies. Don't confuse the fact that fundies will applaud anything RW with doing better. The nation is watching.

[I thought you were just taking solace in the fact that the nation was watching the Olympics instead.]

It pains me to say it but I think McCain came off better tonight. That is not saying that I agree with McCain. I didn't like McCain's substantive answers. But I thought McCain was connecting better. His style was better. You can say all you want about Obama's thoughtful answers but it just wasn't connecting on a people level. Obama could never have convinced this group on the issues but he still could have presented himself in a more connecting way. When faced with a hostile group, you have to woo them. It reminded me of the Bush 1/Clinton debates in 1992 when Clinton was almost hugging those asking questions while Bush looked at his watch. Obama must correct this before the debates. The good news is that this kind of stuff can be corrected. Also, the good news is that most were watching the Olympics

[And the bad news is that YouTube is out there.]

I agree McCain did better. Obama is making the exact same mistake that so many Dems before him have made. He plays the game by the repugs' rules and bends over backwards to not offend the fundies, instead of making them look like the throwbacks they are.

[Buyer's Remorse?]

While both seemed at ease, I thought McCain's answers more direct and to the point than Obama's. McCain also appeared more animated than Obama, IMO. I think this particular Q & A format is more conducive to McCain's personal style and I also think that we minimize McCain's abilities at our own peril. I do believe we're looking at what will be a close race.

[What happened to all that Freudenschade victory champagne you were gulping down so recently? And now we visit the gloomy KOmmies...]

Why McCain's "win" wasn't really a win at the FBF

[What you saw you didn't really see.]

I am somewhat upset at the chicken littling going on over the Faith Based Forum. Obama did a great job expressing who he is. McCain gave a stump speech to his base.

[Keep trying to convince yourself of this.]

Remember McCain pronouncing "America" as "Amuurica"? How many times do you figure we'll be hearing that in an ad soon?

[Very "substantive" criticism there.]

As an Obama supporter, one has to read between the lines and look forward. What he does is planned, and planned with precision. I would urge those going into fits of clucking to think about this and look forward a day or so. Stay focused and try not to let your heads explode over things like this. One thing I think we can all agree on is; Obama is not stupid. He did this forum for a reason and he wouldn't have done it if he didn't think he was going to come out of it without a net gain in votes. IMHO, he accomplished that and more. He came off as thoughtful, pragmatic and grounded in his faith. Have faith, he accomplished much tonight!

[Translation: Don't panic! Obama only came across terribly because it was all part of his perfect plan.]

Perhaps panic helps some people focus.

[The power of positive panicking.]

McCain beat our ass tonight

[May we now hit the Panic Button?]

Obama had better kick McCain's ass in the debates, or he's toast. Try not to forget he's only half-white.

[Try not to forget that you're obsessed with race.]

I think they asked McCain things they already knew the answers too as if they wanted to help him promote his views.

[It was that glass up against the door in that "cone of silence."]

It sure looks like McCain had already seen the questions. Normally, he has trouble putting a couple of sentences together. Last night, he seemed prepared.

[It was either that glass against the door in the "cone of silence" or the intercom pumping the Obama interview in. I'm not sure which.]

Not to worry. It will be replayed ad infinitum

[On lots of McCain ads.]

look at the bright side they'll have to give more airtime to Obama to get his complete answers.

[Um, uh, well, ah, I think, uh, that perphaps, um, that you could be, uh, right.]

At worst it was a tie.

[A few more "ties" like that and Obama will have to wave the white flag.]

One of my best friends is a fundamentalist Xian hardcore fundie, rightwing black conservative. He just left a voicemail on my phone (I was at a party) hopping mad about the debate. He nearly yelled into my phone:

[BOGUS STORY ALERT!!! Stand by for a completely phony sounding story!]

"I don't know how anybody could vote for McCain after that performance. If he had told one more story -- 'Let me tell you a story' to this, 'let me tell you something' to that -- all he did was shuck and bob and duck."

[Said the "fundy friend."]

My friend continued:

[You mean your "friend" continued:]

"I really liked Obama. He was honest and clearly explained his position on things. I may not agree with everything he said, but at least he had the strength to stand by his convictions and state his case."

[You need to make your phony stories sound a lot more authentic than this but continue...]

Mind you, this is coming from a 52-year-old professional upper-middle class man in the suburbs of Cleveland, Ohio who has never voted for a Democrat in his life, and he's as full-blown born-again evangelical non-denominational Christian as they come. He closed with this message.

["The preceding is a work of KOmmie fiction."]

"This finally made me make my decision. You've won. I'm voting for Obama."

[How very convenient that this story appears right after Obama Bombed Bombed.]

Yippy! If you are fibbing your nose will fall off.

[Attention everybody in the audience! Please do not move! We are searching for a KOmmie Pinnochio nose somewhere on the floor of the auditorium.]

Obama, OTOH, did himself no harm at all tonight. He lost no support, and probably opened quite a few minds.

[And opened quite a few wounds.]

Jesus would vote for Obama. I am a Christian, and I am sure of that.

[Attention! We have another KOmmie Pinocchio nose on the floor!]

Jesus would not have a vote ... His ass would be either in Gitmo or renditioned to wherever Caesar is now.

[Stated the KOmmie biblical scholar.]

I didn't watch, but the feeling I get is that we really do need to work to win back the White House. It's not going to be a cake-walk. I'm donating tonight, since that's about the only thing I can do right now.

[Barack Obama is just $10 away from winning a debate.]

We have been here before. You don't bring Karate to a gun fight. You bring an Uzzi. McCain brought an Uzzi. Obama brought a pocket knife and got ambushed. It's time to stop this crap.

[But...but I thought Obama won at that forum. At least that is what you KOmmies have been trying ever so hard to convince yourselves of.]

His answer "above my pay grade" will be in an ad tomorrow. He appeared to give non answers to me. And he must have said uh and um a hundred times!

[LIAR!!! It was just 99 times!]

did you not notice the um and uhhs all over the place? One of Obamas greatest gifts is his superior oratory skills. Where were they tonight? It made him appear hesitant to me. And ill spoken.

[Obama's superior oratory skills are still on vacation in Hawaii.]

I know there are many answers but they wanted Obama's answer. And he didn't give one.

[Because it was above his pay grade.]

McCain won, but it wasn't at all a bad night for Obama. He didn't screw up, he looked good, and pulled of what he came for.

[It wasn't a bad night for Obama. It was a disastrous night.]

McCain was talking to the audience. Obama was having a conversation with Rick Warren. McCain's style was much more effective. Obama needs to learn to speak over the questioner to the country - if he doesn't, he is going to have big problems.

[Houston, we have a problem. A BIG problem.]

OBAMA GOT CREAMED...NO OTHER WAY TO LOOK at it. If it wasnt his crowd why go in there. Would obama campaign to a kkk rally? Would he go and speak before the right to life? why do this. He just gets done with a hawaian vacation and looked like he was still on vacation. Terrible planing. Its simple...until the obama staff gets off their high horse and realize this is dirty campaign they will get their ass kicked. simple...

[A KOmmie speaks uncomfortable truth to power.]

David Shuster agreed with Pat Buchanan that McCain "won" tonight, and that this may have been McCain's finest hour. Michelle Bernard chimed in with her agreement. Then MSNBC went to the regular "true-crime" format, at which time, of course, all remote controls I know of switch from MSNBC to CNN.

[And Shuster looked just as unhappy as when Karl Rove was NOT indicted on May 12, 2006 despite Shuster's tip from "reliable source" Jason Leopold.]

Not to mention the fact that Obama is about to announce his VP, more than likely at the beginning of this week. That's going to suck most of what happened at the debate up.

[And erase away the memory of his horrible forum performance.]

Don't sprinkle sugar on this shit and try to tell me it's candy. This was not a win for Obama by any stretch of the imagination. CNN did an after-event interview with him and he was pissed. They commented that they'd never seen him like this before.

And with good reason - Obama was used tonight, and he knows it. McCain got an hour-long, nationally televised campaign commercial, complete with a wildly cheering crowd and a friendly host.

Obama got played tonight. There might be one good thing to come out of this conference, though - so far, Obama has seemed to cling to the belief that McCain was going to run an honorable campaign and we could have an open, honest debate about the issues. That's not going to happen. This is war, and hopefully, Obama finally realized it tonight.

[Damn that McCain for not losing a debate on purpose.]

Since the pundits think that McCain "won", the expectations for Obama for the actual debates will be VERY LOW which is good. The pundits will expect McCain to do better during the debates which is good for Obama. One always wants to have lower expectations.

[So Obama won by losing?]

Obama didn't go in this to win it...

[...but to lose it so as to lower expectations of him in future debates (see above).]

Initially, I wanted to vomit after watching this...

[Until I convinced myself that Obama's loss was really a win because he lowered expectations about himself.]

watch obama name vp on monday to stop the bleeding

[Or maybe Obama could moon us to take our minds off the bleeding.]

It was like a vegan walking into a greasy-spoon diner and trying to convince the patrons of the evils of eating meat. This was futile and our media will call this a win for McWarBucks.

[I once was dining at a rib joint when some PETA NUtcases plastered anti-meat leaflets all over the front of the restaurant. Just made my ribs taste better..]

It probably doesn't matter anyway... Because the majority of people were most likely watching the Olympics

[Please keep hoping that the majority of the people never heard of something called YouTube.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: barackobama; dummies; johnmccain; kommies; rickwarren; saddleback
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To: Charles Henrickson
Obama is about to announce his VP. . . .

Please, please let it be one of these two...

Photobucket
81 posted on 08/17/2008 7:24:38 PM PDT by Right_Wing_Madman
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To: PJ-Comix

“One thing I think we can all agree on is; Obama is not stupid.”

There are DUmmies in all 57 states who agree with you.


82 posted on 08/17/2008 7:34:22 PM PDT by beans36 (Obama: The Wizard of Uhs)
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To: PJ-Comix
"McPOW gave all of the answers that the LIV in fly over country love."

I can't figure out what they mean by LIV. Anyone know? Is it (fill in the blank) independent voters?

83 posted on 08/17/2008 7:56:45 PM PDT by BBell
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To: BBell

Low Information Voters. Someone comes up with one of these stupid phrases (or “memes” as they like to say) and soon they are all repeating them like sheep.


84 posted on 08/17/2008 8:09:07 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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To: Roscoe Karns; PJ-Comix; Paul Heinzman
Low Information Voters.

That's go to be it. I've noticed that phrase going around; now it's down to an acronym.

85 posted on 08/17/2008 8:57:07 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (GO CUBS GO!)
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To: PJ-Comix

86 posted on 08/17/2008 9:16:51 PM PDT by Catholic Canadian ( I love Stephen Harper!)
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To: Roscoe Karns
Low Information Voters. God I hate these people. They think that anyone who does not agree with them and tote the party line is an ignorant hillbilly. They are some truly elitist dumb asses. As Rush says: educated beyond their intelligence.
87 posted on 08/17/2008 9:27:09 PM PDT by BBell
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To: Staff Sgt. Max Fightmaster

Welcome aboard, PINGEE #1016.


88 posted on 08/18/2008 3:14:24 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List ---The BIGGEST on the FR!!!)
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To: PJ-Comix
One of Obamas greatest gifts is his superior oratory skills. Where were they tonight?

On a teleprompter somewhere in Chicago.

89 posted on 08/18/2008 4:34:04 AM PDT by beckysueb (Drill here! Drill now!)
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To: reg45

When libs have a choice between glamor and a modicum of substance, they’ll go for glamor every time. Hillary Clinton is by no stretch of the imagination qualified to be prez. But she is more qualified than Obama who is basically a smooth-talking (when he has a teleprompter) non-entity. And Black. The libs just couldn’t help themselves. Hillary would have answered the questions in the forum a lot better than the Anointed One. They wouldn’t have been good answers, but she’s better on her feet than Obama who should carry a portable teleprompter with him wherever he goes.


90 posted on 08/18/2008 4:39:52 AM PDT by driftless2
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To: PJ-Comix
" If it wasnt his crowd why go in there. Would obama campaign to a kkk rally? Would he go and speak before the right to life? why do this.."

McCain spoke to the NAACP and the Urban league, But Obama won't appear at a forum with the US military. And Obama won't debate with Brit Hume as a moderator.

Whats that say about Obama? I'll tell you what that says. He's the world's biggest wuss, and you moonbats chose him to be your nominee. It says alot about moonbats too.

91 posted on 08/18/2008 5:43:09 AM PDT by libs_kma (NOBAMA. Keep the change)
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To: Cementjungle

Looks like Obama had some type of heads-up on the topics.

http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2008/08/17/warren-mccain-did-not-violate-cone-of-silence/


92 posted on 08/18/2008 6:24:25 AM PDT by vietvet67
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To: PJ-Comix
Some moron at DU posted this:

f*ck the religious right.

Bet you would love to - not for love but to get your ROCKS off!! I bet you do it with a sheep!! :-)

Two other morons posted the following:

His Vietnam stories and owning up to his marital failure was excellent He's been succinct in his answers. As dumb as his answers have been, he's been pretty straightforward.

I'm rolling my eyes at his Vietnam stories.

Libs are you still fighting the Vietnam war? What were you doing back then? Protesting the war - like the little commies you are??

Another moron posted this:

I've been shocked at how well McCain has done compared to what I was expecting. That very well could be it.

I'm surprise it took you LIBs this early to see the MESSIAH of the Dems can't speak without a teleprompter.

Another DUmmy posted this:

This stuff sells to Middle America. If my parents were still alive they would love it.

They are rolling over in their grave to have a DUmmy as a relative! :-)

93 posted on 08/18/2008 7:00:14 AM PDT by RightWingTeen (Caution: homeschooled teen with a Brain that works - LIBERALS you can't control me!!)
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To: reg45
That is the heart of the problem. The older voters (who would vote for someone like McCain) are dying off and being replaced on the voting rolls by teenagers (who will most likely vote for a rock star like Obama).

Please do not lump TEENAGERS (like me) in with BRAIN DEAD LIBERALS. You just insulted TEENAGERS who are not BRAINWASHED in the GOVERNMENTAL SOCIALIST INDOCTRINATION CENTERS (fka: Public School!!)

94 posted on 08/18/2008 7:08:02 AM PDT by RightWingTeen (Caution: homeschooled teen with a Brain that works - LIBERALS you can't control me!!)
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To: PJ-Comix

Ping to read later


95 posted on 08/18/2008 7:34:18 AM PDT by Alex Murphy
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To: RightWingTeen
LOL, aren't most of you guys too young to vote anyway?

Heh, I guess for most dems and ACORN you don't even have to be alive anymore...

96 posted on 08/18/2008 8:06:41 AM PDT by To Hell With Poverty (I'll take a "third Bush term" over a second Carter term ANY DAY!)
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To: PJ-Comix; franksolich; All

“He’s doing better than Obama because he is pandering to American ego.”

As opposed to Barakstar! pandering to the Ghost of Stalin and Lenin.


97 posted on 08/18/2008 8:28:43 AM PDT by txradioguy (Welcome Home Delta Company 3rd US INF The Old Guard Job Well Done!)
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To: PJ-Comix; franksolich; All

“Well, given the fact that he just asked about the justices question before the guy had even GOTTEN TO THAT QUESTION, you can clearly see why he’s doing ok (for McCain). He knew the questions. He’s rehearsed. He rattles off stuff because he knew what the questions were.”

Why can’t the Dems just accept the fact that their candidates don’t sound genuine and truthful in their responses during forums like this?

NBC and Barakstars! claim that McCain cheated is no different than the hysterical handwringing and conspiracy theory launching claim that President Bush was wearing an earpiece and having his answers fed to him off stage during his debates with John Kerry.


98 posted on 08/18/2008 8:31:46 AM PDT by txradioguy (Welcome Home Delta Company 3rd US INF The Old Guard Job Well Done!)
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To: y6162
“This stuff sells to Middle America. If my parents were still alive they would love it.”

Eric Menendez

In 10 years of continuous posting on FreeRepublic, I've never said the following comment:

I spit up my cereal when I read your comment! Bravo!

99 posted on 08/18/2008 8:36:29 AM PDT by Hildy ("We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.")
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To: Hildy

“I spit up my cereal when I read your comment! Bravo!”

Thanks. Congrats for knowing who Eric is/was.


100 posted on 08/18/2008 8:39:15 AM PDT by y6162 (uot)
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