It Depends on the Definition of "Need" (Are men attracted to needy women?)

Yahoo discussion group ^ | 6-30-06 | Dear Margo Column

[Enterprise]

"?DEAR MARGO: I am a 38-year-old successful female who is emotionally and financially secure. I have been told that I am very attractive and intimidate men. I would like to get married but am thought to be too independent"

[HairOfTheDog]

Reducing people to a few shallow features such as looks or money is a common flaw in people of both genders, those who commonly end up having their relationships last.

WOOOPS!

Make that:

Reducing people to a few shallow features such as looks or money is a common flaw in people of both genders, those who commonly end up having their relationships NOT last.

[marajade]

That's just a sorry excuse if you ask me.

[HitmanLV]

My post # 135 is exlictly about what helps make a long term relationship work.

[HairOfTheDog]

Agreed, but she isn't going to stay 25, and you've said women who are 35 or, heaven forbid 45, are unappealing to you, I'm curious what falls into your definition of 'long term'.

[Enterprise]

See post #154. I decided to go a little deeper.

[HitmanLV]

I'm a reasonable man. Of course my lady companion would have to age. That's notmal and I wouldn't hold it against her in any way.

My point was only when shopping around for a new companion.

A long term commitment is for a lifetime.

[Enterprise]

"That's just a sorry excuse if you ask me."

Ohhhhhhh, bwahahahahahaha, snippy snippy snippy. Anyway, I didn't ask, and I'm not sorry.

[HairOfTheDog]

Fair enough. And I have found you to be reasonable on other threads, threads where I know you've ticked off a few women...

How long are you going to be just 'shopping' then? :~D You've aged ten years since you started shopping for 25 year old women, will your dates ever age, or will they always be 25?

[HitmanLV]

I am a reasonable man.

I'll keep shopping probably for a couple of more years. No rush, really. My preferred age range for a romantic companion is always 23-28 or so, no matter how old I get.

That's the cool thing about being the HitmanLV! ;-)

[HairOfTheDog]

That's the cool thing about being the HitmanLV! ;-)

Yup, you can make him as cool as you want to make him sound. Won't make it true, but I wish you all the luck the real world has to offer, too. :~)

[HitmanLV]

It works for me.

[stephenjohnbanker]

Maybe marajade would prefer you look at GQ or Playgirl : )

[Old_Mil]

I have a friend in his 40's, partner in a business, who had no trouble at all in acquiring a cute 22 year old girlfriend

Lets here it for cute 22 year old girlfriends!

[Old_Mil]

Women can have babies pretty safely now up until they're in their mid 40s today.

Untrue - you are fertilizing 40 year old eggs and the incidence of downs syndrome babies being born to older mothers is astronomically higher than it is to women in their 20s.

[Enterprise]

"Maybe marajade would prefer you look at GQ or Playgirl"

Those guys are usually gay.

[stephenjohnbanker]

That was my POINT! Now you have to post 2 more cuties!!

[nonliberal]

There is the psychosis thing and every woman I run across is married to a guy that lives in Canada.

I can't catch a break.

[Enterprise]

LOL - ok, but I am going to post one msg on this.

[Enterprise]

Let us for a moment indulge in one of those "how did we get here" interludes.

Ms Independent would have been born somewhere around 1968. That was a hot time in our history. On this July 4, 2006 we recall that 55,000+ young men died in Vuetnam. I'm sure many of them too wanted to live and have a family. God bless them, and I remember them in my prayers.

Ms Independent would have gone through middle school and high school from about 1980 to 1986. During those years she would have been praised, encouraged, and given a lot of talk about what she can accomplish. You know, a lot of this woo hoo girl power crap. Graduating in approximately 1986 she would have gone on to college.

She probably actually met one or two men who were interested in her. Rush Limbaugh touched on this once, on how many women who are still single had the chance, but they, like Ms Independent chose to pursue a career and demonstrate - yea verily - PROVE their equality with men. And so, she did.

She would have graduated around 1990. You go girl, WOO HOO. Yikes - a LOT of feminism around then, rivers of it. She got a job, and settled in. In time, she started earning good money, got a good car, and had a nice place to live. And during this time, she didn't quite meet a man good enough for her. Though she learned how to compete with men, she just never quite learned how to talk to them. Oh, she still had her klatchy female friends, so it was comforting to her. Kind of like how comforting the N.Y. Times is to liberals.

She is dimly aware now, that she blew it big time. All those years of education and a career, and at 38 she has to write to a hack columnist for advice on how to get a man, and have a baby. Sad isn't it? She should have asked that question at age 22. In fact, my advice to all young women who want a man and a baby, is to start asking that question now. Don't wait until you're a clueless 38-yeard old. Alone, afraid, and childless.

[wizardoz]

Let's not get carried away. No one, male or female, should settle down with the wrong person simply so as not to be "alone and childless" at 38. Any idiot can have a child. Any idiot can stumble into a bad marriage. I'm not going to hold this woman any lower because she avoided that sort of trap.

It may not be as simple as "marry any man who'll have you." I mean, if that's all conservatism has to offer women, it's no surprise that so many of them have drifted over to liberalism. It at least offers more. It can't deliver, but it offers more than what you just offered.