"Birth Control Is Selfish" ... The Message Society Doesn't Want To Hear

No Room for Contraception ^

[nrfcmedia]

"Birth Control Is Selfish" ... The Message Society Doesn't Want To Hear

This past weekend graduates of Saint Thomas University were treated to a surprising speech by 21-year-old graduating student Ben Kessler. Some graduates walked out, many jeered, and others spewed profanities in response to his speech.

Just what did he speak of which caused such an outcry? The War in Iraq? Border control? NSA spying? None of the above.

So, what exactly did Mr. Kessler do wrong? He touched society's third rail: contraception. Mr. Kessler had the audacity to call the use of birth control "an act of selfishness."

One would have expected some encouraging applause from the audience, after all St. Thomas is a Catholic institution. The reality is that many of these Catholic students and family members are themselves using contraception, and Mr. Kessler confronted their lifestyle and the use of contraception.

Mr. Kessler dared to speak about this issue and people didn't want to hear his message. What happened to the exchange of ideas universities are famous for? Where were all of the supposed "open minds" at during this speech? Instead of listening to his speech with an open mind, it seems that they were too busy keeping themselves ignorant by jeering and ridiculing him.

Society has a lust affair with birth control to the point of not being able to think outside of the box. We live in a contraception "matrix" where it's impossible to believe that there are any harmful effects on marriage, society, and the health of women.

This "contraception deception" is the primary force behind the attacks against the contra-contraception message.

For the most part, society doesn't want to hear the message. This message is that, in our culture, contraception leads to increases in abortion, teenage sex, affairs (and subsequent divorce), health problems, and statutory rape. These facts are apparent by simply comparing statistics.

Why are people willfully preserving their ignorance? For the past century, people have lived in a society that endorses the practice of a contraceptive lifestyle of easy, commitment free, and on-demand sex without challenging them to question possible adverse effects.

Mr. Kessler could have spoke about the start of a career, the discernment of a vocation, the undertaking of new responsibilities, or many other subjects related to graduation. But hopefully his bold message will help to his classmates to question the force-fed information they have heard all their lives concerning human sexuality and contraception and arrive at a more natural, healthier view of human sexuality.

The contraception debate is long overdue, and it is people like Mr. Kessler who are breaking down the walls of ignorance, selfishness, and deception. Society may be resistant to this message, but over time the truth will prevail.

[Notwithstanding]

Birth control can be considered selfish:

1. "I have a right to consequence-free sex whenever I want."
2. "There is no reason my partner should not give me sex on demand."
3. "We used birth control, so abortion is OK in our case."
4. "Sex is simply recreation - the procreative part is unnecessary baggage, and it is silly that God or whomever linked sex to procreation."
5. "I want to have time for me/career/fulfillment/toys/vacations and having (more than 1/2/3) kids get in the way of that."
6. "I want a comfortable middle class lifestyle for me and my family, and having (more than 1/2/3) kids gets in the way of that."

[Notwithstanding]

7. "How dare God think that I should let Him determine the size of my family!"

[Notwithstanding]

Can you honestly say that with your family's means you could not possibly have raised another child?

For most who forward your argument, the answer would be "no".

And when the answer is "no", then it a lack of trust in God's providence - or often selfishness - that causes people to limit the number of kids. I have those same concerns (can I provide a decent life for all my kids) and desires (time for me), but I have trusted in God's providence nevertheless, and as a family we have gained far more than we have sacrificed.

[JoeSixPack1]

WOW,, thread hijacked at the 2nd post. Might be a record.

[linda_22003]

We're a free country, and part of that freedom is deciding how many children to have. You're welcome to have twelve, I'm welcome to have none. Pushing an agenda that meddles with people's personal lives is not what I thought conservatism was about, but so much has changed.

[topher]

The speaker EARNED THE RIGHT TO SPEAK.

This guy was a 4.0 in Philosophy but he was also a Defensive Tackle on the football team.

Why is what he is saying true? Because having a kid is an unselfish act - it is sharing your life with your children. Having a family to raise children in.

This is known as pro-creation, and the real fruit of our labors is pro-creation.

It is an UNSELFISH act because it means the mother must commit to 9 nine months of carrying a child within her.

It is an UNSELFISH act because the father commits to not only provide for himself and the mother, but also their children.

The guy was a Philosophy major and he knows what he is talking about. It is just the message people did not want to hear.

Before the 1950s, there were a number of REAL families in the US. That meant a mother, father, and the children.

THEN SOME WACKO LIBERAL THOUGHT THAT THE RULES WERE SOCIETY WERE ALL WRONG AND THAT WE SHOULD BE AN IMMORAL SOCIETY.

Enter the hippies of the 60s, sex of children with children in the 70s and the general turmoil of the 80s, 90s, and now the 21st Century.

The family unit has been decimated by the FREE SEX concept - have sex any way you want with whomever you want.

Now single parent families are the rule, not the exception. Divorce is quite common, as is unmarried couples.

Like I said before, the guy was a philosphy major and he was correct. And he was talking about CATHOLIC principles at a CATHOLIC UNIVERSITY GRADUATION.

WHAT PART OF THE ABOVE DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND.

You sound like some flaky liberal. Are you?

Morality is a pivot point for conservative thinking. Immorality is the pivot point for liberal, wacko thinking.

On what point on you going to pivot - the liberal/wacko one or the conservative one...

[linda_22003]

Nope, your memory doesn't serve. Six is correct. He had one child with his first wife (Alice), who died soon after delivery, of Bright's disease which was either triggered or aggravated by the pregnancy. His mother died on the same day in the same house, which has to be one of the most awful situations any of us could imagine.

He had five children with his wife Edith: Theodore Jr. (a brigadier general in WWII), Kermit, Ethel, Archie, and Quentin (killed in WWI).

[cowtowney]

We need more kids. We need to sustain our society. The folks who said we needed to have less kids...blah blah...population explosion...blah...were dead wrong.

Our society needs to support more kids, family life, etc in any way possible. Thank God the Pope and Catholic Church are promoting this. I sure wish other churches would. You don't turn around population problems like this quickly.

[NYer]

Excellent editorial!

"Neither is it valid to argue, as a justification for sexual intercourse which is deliberately contraceptive, that a lesser evil is to be preferred to a greater one, or that such intercourse would merge with procreative acts of past and future to form a single entity, and so be qualified by exactly the same moral goodness as these. Though it is true that sometimes it is lawful to tolerate a lesser moral evil in order to avoid a greater evil or in order to promote a greater good," it is never lawful, even for the gravest reasons, to do evil that good may come of it (18)—in other words, to intend directly something which of its very nature contradicts the moral order, and which must therefore be judged unworthy of man, even though the intention is to protect or promote the welfare of an individual, of a family or of society in general. Consequently, it is a serious error to think that a whole married life of otherwise normal relations can justify sexual intercourse which is deliberately contraceptive and so intrinsically wrong."
HUMANAE VITAE

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[Clioman]

Are you series?

[topher]

This was a commencement speech at a CATHOLIC University that had controversy earlier this year.

There was to be a trip to Europe and some of the chaperones wanted to go as unmarried couples (women sleeping with women - I think they might have been faculty or grad students).

Anyway, the CATHOLIC UNIVERSITY put its foot down, and said, no, there can be no unmarried couples sleeping together on a CATHOLIC UNIVERSITY trip to Europe.

The guy was addressing this issue, which was a volatile one before the student body over the course of the year, and he tried to put the perspective a PHILOSOPHY major would put on it (Ben Kessler had a 4.0 in philosophy).

Now this was not geek or dweeb. He was the DEFENSIVE TACKLE on the University Football team (so just call him sir, well just out of respect for a guy about 6 foot 5 five and 260 pounds of muscle).

There are some earlier articles on this that might help.

But basically, you a commencement at a CATHOLIC UNIVERSITY by an overachieving CATHOLIC student who knows philosophy... And he was talking about CATHOLIC/CHRISTIAN morality.

And if you look around today at all the unmarried 40 somethings and 50 somethings and 60 somethings that are divorced and live screwed up lives because they engages in whatever sexual habits they saw fit, you would see alot of unhappiness.

The guy knows what he is talking about. And should deserve some respect for being a University Football player. Most of those jocks know how to get into trouble in school and need special tutors to pass remedial Math (or maybe that is the basketball team). And then when they get involved in illegal activities like the DUKE LACROSSE TEAM, they get arrested and thrown out of school.

I think the talk was a talk that was needed to be given to graduating students.

Last year at this time, a young high school grad from Alabama went to somewhere in the Carribean looking for sex and getting drunk, and she never returned.

Or is the SCANDAL of the DUKE BLUE DEVILS LACROSSE team more appropriate to bring up at this time.

There are consequences to ones actions. Deciding not to have sex and not to use contraception is probably a good point to make.

Virginity is really not a four letter word. It is a nine letter word, if one can actually count after graduating from college. And it is something that people should be taught to admire and respect. Instead, we have become a culture of animals - animals have sex whenever and wherever they want to. They can even have sex with animals of other species such as, well just other animals...

I don't see a problem with making an attempt to rein in our immorality and talk about MORAL ISSUES that students should strive for...

[tcostell]

You go to Mexico and ask those kids if they would rather be alive or not. Their life may not be what you would like it to be, but it's still a life.

This kid was making a point of morality, and his thesis is absolutely correct as far as it goes.
while you on the other hand are trying to wrap your racism in a veil of compassion. Frankly I think you should be ashamed of yourself.

[Junior]

If contraception is selfish, then those welfare queens with a half-dozen+ kids are the most generous people on the face of the Earth.

Yeah, right.

[NYer]

I read elsewhere that this guy wants to enter a seminary. He figured he'd start wagging his finger at people to get a little practice for the kind of priest he'd be.

This young man should be applauded for the courage to remind his peers of where they should place their priorities. I am surprised by your attack on this young man who plans to enter the seminary.

[trisham]

Good post.

[Gordongekko909]

Take a pill. At no point did I disagree with what the kid actually said. He just said it in the wrong place.

[Gordongekko909]

Hi again.

It still doesn't make sense. The people he was addressing wouldn't be attending that school anymore. Once again, not the time nor the place.

[Carpe Cerevisi]

I guess when God said, "Be fruitful and multiply" he was just making a suggestion.

[Scotswife]

"It is more than an appropriate topic for a commencement speech at a Catholic University, I disagree."

I do not agree with the WAY it was presented.
Like another poster suggested, there could have been a more positive way to present the same idea...i.e. praising the virutes of married couples who are open to life and who surrender to God's will.
Or...presenting the beauty of the Church's teaching regarding the true nature of sex vs. the world's twisted view of sex.

I don't agree that talking down to people at their own graduation is an effective way to get through to them, and I don't think a graduation ceremony is the place where we are going to make up for years of inadequate catechetical training (although there are other venues for that)

The WAY this was approached only alienated people.
Now I know that some people think that is OK...that it is acceptable to alienate people because they seem to think they deserve to be alienated.
But that only makes me wonder who this is benefitting.
It seems to me it benefits those who like to say "Aha ...gotcha you sinners! We're right! therefore we are justified to be as in-you-face as we can be!"

The problem is this approach does not achieve the intended goal...to cause people to reflect on the Church's teaching.

[Antoninus]

Nope, your memory doesn't serve. Six is correct.

Yes, that is correct. Six it was.