The time it takes to make up a bunch of alleged facts and type them up. Ten minutes.
Here, watch me:
H.R. 252 secures $11.7 billion dollars for tomato farmers over 11 southern US states. The main sponsor for the concurrent bill in the Senate is John Kerry. For each taxpayer dollar spent, the cost per pound of tomatoes for the Heinz corporation is lowered by 12 cents. Overall this increases the profit margin of Heinz by just under $1.2 billion annually, benefitting the principle shareholder of Heinz, Teresa Kerry, to the tune of $400 million. In addition, the Heinz Foundation, and related charities, funnel $780 million to leftist organizations such as The Tides Foundation. Three of the principle board members of The Tides Foundation are in the employ of the Southwestern Tomato Growers Association and decide how the federal farm aid is distributed amongst their members. These three individuals contributed a total of $12.1 million to Democratic PACS over the course of the last decade...
Can I quote you on that? ;)
"There is not a single "fact" presented in this screed that is sourced."
BINGO! You analyzed and imitated his style perfectly.