Skip to comments.Presidential Speech I'd Love to See
Posted on 10/30/2005 10:30:41 PM PST by Americanwolfsbrother
The Speech of a Lifetime - We are all waiting for this day
WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?
My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of Iraq regime has been completed.
Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now to begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United Kingdom , Spain, Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are some of the countries listed there.
The other list contains everyone not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war.
The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell-holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France.
In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France, or maybe China..
I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France, Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. Bon chance, mes amis.
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York
A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change.
Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra tank and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put em? Yep, border security. So start doing something with your oil.
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now.
We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil in Alaska - which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there. They care.
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, "darn tootin."
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America It is time to eliminate homelessness in America. It is time to eliminate World Cup Soccer from America To the nations on List 1, a final thought: Thanks guys. We owe you and we won't forget.
To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to speak Arabic.
God bless America. Thank you and good night.
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English, thank a soldier.
Please move this to blogger/personal. I didn't mean for it to end up in news.activism. Thanks.AWB
A President could not read that in modern day America, but a King could. However, I believe if a man or woman ran on that platform they would be elected. It would be very messy, but they would win. All it would take is courage. Something that is in short supply in our political class.
always good though..
This is stupid reasoning. Because congress doesn't want to fund it we've succeeded? The rest of this 'dream speach' may be worthwhile, but it sure starts out lousy, so I won't know what the rest says.
Here's a quarter. Buy a sense of humor.AWB
A sense of humor wouldn't help make the afformentioned serious lack in judgement any funnier.
So you admit to being short sighted due to the fact that you don't agree with on part of this speech and refuse to read the rest to put the comment in context... jeez... do you stop listing to half the State of the Union speech because you don't agree with something... or do you stop listening to a family memeber half way through because their statment has stupid reasoning? You are very short sighted and lack a sense of humor. I would had to see how you react to ideas you hate....
You consider yourself a good brother for defending yours when the reasoning is stupid. I consider myself one for helping my brothers see the fault in theirs. Of course, we fought a lot as kids.
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